


A Simple Rose

by hannah1607



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-07-29
Updated: 2014-08-31
Packaged: 2017-12-21 19:08:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 9
Words: 25,600
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/903809
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hannah1607/pseuds/hannah1607
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The darkness in her heart and the lightness in his. It would seem an unlikely match, yet Helga Hufflepuff finds herself drawn to a love that she knows cannot last or endure the battles the founders will face. All roses bare traces of green, however golden their petals.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Simple Rose

A Simple Rose

I could always think better out of doors, but unlike Godric I didn't always need to be doing something. Rowena and Salazar always headed to their offices or in Rowena's case, the library. I, on the other hand, preferred to just meander round the forests and the grounds, not necessarily looking for something, just watching the world. I smiled to myself, rich earth clinging to my fingers. The day was bright and surprisingly warm, I'd long cast aside my mustard yellow cloak and instead was just wearing a plain, brown work dress. I pushed back a tendril of hair, realising all too late that I had left a smear of mud on my cheek. Oh well, it hardly mattered. I carefully removed the potted plant and placed it amongst the bed of other herbs. I attempted to rub my cheek with my shoulder. Once the plant was in and the earth firm around the base I leant back on my heels, enjoying the warm air and the coolness of long cast shadows, as the pine trees quavered in the wind. Perhaps I would take a walk around the lake once I was done, it was unlike my home, but I enjoyed the grey, still water and thick forests. I got up and brushed my hands down my apron.

"You look like a peasant." A voice sneered.  
I turned to look at Salazar as he walked down the hill, that ever present swagger and easy grace so obvious with his walk. When he stopped beside me he assumed a pose that would have looked overly practiced normally, but for him it was always easy. I rolled my eyes and picked up my tools, depositing the trowel and fork into the wicker basket by my side.  
"And you look like a lord who's never done an honest day's work in his life." I bit back.  
He smiled coolly at that, "Nicely played."  
"Checkmate." I replied and he laughed; I was almost surprised, Godric and I tended to be the ones who laughed, Rowena certainly did at times but she did not appreciate simple humour, Salazar tended to just give a small smirk. The laugh he gave was still controlled and quiet, but I smiled at him and then continued walking down the path. I heard him follow quickly.  
"Does my company displease you, Helga?" he asked.  
"Nay, Salazar. But as I am 'peasant' I thought my company would be displeasing for you."  
Salazar gave another even smile, "I shall overlook it."  
I continued on my way, Salazar's tread beside me, before reaching a number of bushes I had planted. My fingers curled round several unopened, green buds and I couldn't hide my childish smile on seeing the small, sharp pink-red thorns. I was hoping for a pale white blossom. A long fingered, elegant hand rested near mine and I looked up to Salazar examining the plant.

"I do not recognise this. It is no magical plant or herb, I take it?"  
I grinned, "Nay, this is a simple wild rose. Found all over this isle."  
He frowned further, "Then what is its use?"  
I carefully inspected the leaves for blight or insects, but was content with what I saw, "Alas, it has none. It is but a flower to look fair and smell sweetly. Though there are some who say it relieves aches, especially those of the stomach, yet mint and wormwood work better."  
"Then why grow it at all?" his dark eyes near glared into mine, and I almost took a step back as though I feared him, yet what I felt was not fear in its entirety. I could feel a steady blush crawl to my cheeks and my heart takes a faster pace.  
"I…I…Well, you all gave me the grounds and gardens to do with as I please."  
His lip curls slightly, "To plant useless flowers? It would serve us better if you planted cabbages."  
"I have already done that, the vegetable patch is doing nicely." I say a little proudly, jutting out my chin somewhat.

Salazar snickers and takes my chin within his grasp, I can feel my mouth drop slightly and a burning sensation when his fingers touch me.  
"You ought not to do that, your face is too round to look proud." Salazar drops his hand and folds his arms over his chest, his eyes still on the roses. He makes a soft 'Hmm' sound and after ignoring my annoyed look I turn to face the roses as well.  
"I like them. Can we not enjoy the things we find the most rewarding? Cannot something belong in our life, even though there is no real reason for it belonging there?" He looks puzzled for a moment, then swiftly turns on heel and goes back up the path. I run to catch up with him, cursing the long skirts I am wearing and my heavy boots.  
"Have I offended you, Salazar?"  
He keeps walking, even when I speak. "Nay, not at all."  
"Then why are you walking away from me?"  
"Am I? I assumed we both had work that needed to be done."  
I grab hold of his sleeve and ignore the grimace he gives on seeing my muddy hands.  
"Would you mind releasing me, this tunic was only washed this morning."  
I rolled my eyes, "By magic, it won't take too much difficulty in flicking your wand and getting the soap to scrub it again."

I still pull away my hand, but he remains watching me.  
"What did I say that angered you? I'd rather know it now, then have you trying to get me to guess."  
"I assure you, you have said nothing that has angered me."  
"Then why the sudden…?" I begin, but he raises his hand to stop me.  
"I was going to write down your question and bring it up this evening; it would make a most interesting discussion. Do the things we love come easily to us? Or must we for ever suffer in their name? Perfection."  
His tongue seemingly caressed the words he spoke. I shivered. He frowned once more and pulled my cloak more tightly around me, I was acutely aware of how tall he was in comparison to me. It wasn't too hard to be taller than myself, but somehow I was more aware of it with Salazar…maybe it was the arrogance, after all he looked down on me, in both senses of the word. Which was strange, Godric was taller than all of us, but I felt protected by his strength and stature. Rowena's grace stemmed from her elegant, slim figure and gently, swaying hips. My rounded figure and curves were more motherly than anything else.

"You are occupied?" Salazar said, that familiar smirk back. I shifted away from him and made my way up the path.  
He gave another laugh, "What have I said that has offended you?"  
"Nothing…I just…" he caught up with me and clasped my elbow.  
"What is it?"  
My cheeks reddened again and I cursed the day I was given pale skin. He vehemently scowled, until lines cut into his forehead and sharpened his nose. He was waiting for an answer.  
"I was just thinking about how short I am." I said.  
He smiled somewhat, "How short you are? By all things living, the vanity of women…"  
"I am not vain." I snapped, "I have no desire to be any taller than I am now, I was just merely thinking of how everyone else is a good deal taller than I. It was purely an observation, not a desire."  
"An observation well made, you are shorter than everyone else." he teased.

I sighed and moved my arm away again.  
"Now may I continue walking?" I asked.  
He gave a solemn bow, but still followed me as we made our way towards the main entrance. We continued thus, until reaching the carved doorway.  
"Do I irritate you?" Salazar asked.  
"You irritate everyone." I replied.  
"But you especially, do I irritate you?" I thought for a moment, shrugged and stamped my muddied feet on the steps.  
"I think irritation is something of a waste, it is futile to let yourself grow angry by the teasing of others."  
"But do you grow irritated by my teasing?" he came nearer to me; resting a hand on my basket so I lingered by the door. I was drawn to his eyes once more, they were such a dark grey, they were near black in colour. My cheeks flushed again and I bit my lower lip, shifted my weight from one foot to the other. He brought his hand up to my arm.  
"Or do you relish my teasing?" he smirked, his eyes sparkling as though ablaze with fire.  
I smiled back and shrugged, "I tend not to think on it."  
I gently pushed him away and walked into the corridor, he hastily followed but I quickened my pace.  
"Helga, that is not a proper answer." Salazar called to me. I giggled.  
"You are treading mud all over the stairs." he tried again.  
"Then you can clean it up, the magic should not be too difficult." I laughed.


	2. To Make Things Simple

I folded the brown dress over a chair, already baring my apron. My house-elf, Wynny, had demanded I give her my boots, as she would not have me walk over the carpet in them. I had always liked Wynny, she was such a dear thing and feisty for a house-elf. I did not know of many who would demand their mistress remove her boots before entering her own room, but I certainly did not begrudge her for it. Though in fairness I was not really her mistress. I had found her lost and wandering, almost half starved, on the hillock above my tavern. She had been wearing a misshapen and patched cloak, which I soon found out to be made of an old curtain with large stitches and a proper human hat, declaring her to be a free elf. She had been quiet and miserable when I found her, but I soon fed and cheered her up. She did not speak of her previous master or mistress, insisting I was a good friend to have and she still called me Mistress Hufflepuff, yet I never really saw myself as a true mistress.

I took off my underskirts, after Wynny disapparated with my boots to have them cleaned in the kitchen. On this occasion I lazily flicked my wand at the door to lock it and then removed my stockings. I untied my hair and long, faint, red-golden streams hung down my back. I climbed into the wooden tub, the water rising a few inches and then sunk into the warmth.  
"Warm water is heaven." I muttered softly. I relaxed for a while and then picked up a bar of soap to wash the grime from my hands and nails. I gave it a quick sniff and grinned, the faint scent of roses. I rubbed the bar over my arms and chest, then round my neck and after wetting my hair, through it. There was a quiet knock on my door.

"I'm busy." I called out.  
"Doing what?" Salazar's voice came from the other side.  
I grinned, "Bathing."  
There was no reply and I rinsed out the last of the soap from my hair.  
"Do you have your wand with you?" he asked.  
"Not in the bath, no."  
I heard his tut. "A defenceless place to be."  
I laughed and reached for a vial of oil, pouring some into my hand and massaging my scalp.  
"I trust you enough not to come into my chamber and disturb me. I can be surprisingly quick in reaching for my wand and you can expect a nasty hex if you tried." I said.  
I heard his soft chuckle, "Alas, Helga. I do not trust myself."

He teasingly shook the handle of my door and I reached out towards my dress, my wand held in the belt.  
"Don't you dare…What did you want anyway?"  
Salazar fell silent once more and I did not want to lean back in the bath, in case I missed his words.  
"Salazar?" I said after the silence became too heavy.  
"It was not important; I will see you at dinner."  
I heard him turn to leave and cried out to him again, "Salazar, what is it?"  
The room became silent once more and I heard him shift his weight, while he considered speaking, at the door. I heard him sigh softly.  
"It matters not; I will speak to you later." he swiftly marched from my outer chambers and left me frustrated in the cooling bath water.

I finished the rest of my washing and once I had dried myself, I pull on one of my formal evening dresses. It is a soft buttery yellow; I know none of my dresses are as fine as Rowena's, but that would be impractical if they were. Better to admire Rowena's from afar, than ruin my own finest with dirt from the garden and cooking in the kitchen. I suppose I could easily mend them with the right potion or spell, but I could never wear such elegant designs and feel comfortable. Nay, it is better to be me and be happy that way. Peasant dresses or no. I leave my hair a little damp and then hurriedly plait it. It will dry off later, especially if we remain talking around the fire, as so often happens with our dinners. I tie the belt around my waist again and push my wand into the leather holder. Then make my way to Godric's chambers, for that is where we dine tonight. The Great Hall will be our place of dining when the construction of Hogwarts is complete and filled with students, but for now we dine in one another's rooms. Mostly due to my insistence, I found the Great Hall too frighteningly large and empty, even with Godric's expressive manners and Rowena's skill of wit.

"Ah, Helga. I trust your bath was pleasant." Salazar opened the door on my knock, behind him I saw Rowena and Godric already seated at the round, oak table. The warm room was covered in hangings of red and gold, but then Godric had always favoured grandeur and beauty. The fire lit the room brightly and the flames illuminated a tapestry of a roaring lion and a knight clad in armour, one hand bearing a sword, the other buried in the lion's thick mane.  
"Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't realise I was late." I said and moved into the room, avoiding Salazar's gaze, even though I felt it upon my back when I entered.  
"Not at all, Helga. Rowena arrived only moments ago." Godric leapt up and moved a chair back for me. I thanked him and sat down. Rowena smiled at me in welcome.

"Get eating or the soup will get cold." Godric said, I followed the others in picking up my spoon. I breathed in the scent of thyme wafting up from the silver bowls, with the soup being a rich yellow in colour.  
"What is the soup?" I asked.  
Godric shrugged and Rowena gave a small laugh, "Do not tell Helga that, she will be most cross with you for not knowing."  
"Soup is soup." Godric laughed, winking at me, "I assume it's potato or swede."  
I placed a spoonful in my mouth, swallowed and then said, "Parsnip, actually." Godric chuckled and continued to eat his. I rolled my eyes.  
"Do you not care what you eat or where it came from?"  
"As long as it isn't poisoned, I'm not too fussed." Godric said. "Speaking of poison, did I ever tell you about the time someone tried to kill me by dipping my boots in poison?"  
"Poisoning your boots?" Rowena said.  
"They weren't the brightest of sparks; assuredly you would have come up with a better and easier way of doing it." he passed that warm smile and golden look onto Rowena, who grinned and nodded.  
"Aye, I could do, luckily I like you too much."

"…Salazar, what did you wish to speak about?" I asked, having quite forgotten Salazar's question, after Godric regaled us with several stories of attempted murders; until Rowena bade him stop and got him to speak on the tower that would serve as his house's common room. I was only reminded when the conversation moved onto the grounds of Hogwarts and how my gardens did. We were already eating baked apples, with currents and honey, thick cream to pour on top by the time I recalled his question.

"Ah yes…" he lent back in his chair and gazed at the table, as though deep in thought, "I met with Helga today when she was tending some wild roses. An entirely useless plant…"  
"Unless required to show some sentiment, a lover's intent." Rowena smiled mischievously. Salazar raised an eyebrow and Rowena fell silent.  
"As I was saying, an entirely useless plant. With no magical properties and very few herbal qualities…"  
"The thorns can be used in a love potion." Godric said, he was casually leaning back in his chair, arms behind his head. He grinned benignly at Salazar, who scowled vehemently at the interruption.  
"Such potions tends to have a short term effect, either if the person stops supplying it or a remedy is found." Rowena interjected. Salazar filled his wine glass again and carefully took a sip.

"This brings us to my discussion points. What purpose does something serve if it has no real purpose? Or as Helga said, 'Cannot something belong in our life, even though there is no real reason for it belonging there?'" he finished.  
"Salazar, you cannot suggest there must be some reason to find things fair. For one person they may find a painting or building fair, but to you, it may not be. It is all a matter of taste." Godric said.  
"Perhaps I have better taste than others." Salazar smirked and Godric chuckled. "But surely the better something is, the more it serves a purpose."  
"Perhaps its purpose is to be beautiful." Rowena said.  
"Would you desire to only have the purpose of beauty and not be considered to have anything else?" Salazar asked.  
"Nay, I would be offended. But then I am not a rose and I find my purpose through wisdom and learning." Rowena replied.  
"Though you are as fair as one, with all the wisdom you deserve." Godric raised his glass to her and she rolled her eyes. "But what does Helga think? After all, tis her beloved roses she must defend."

I carefully folded my napkin, slowly thinking as to what I should say. I knew Salazar and Rowena often grew impatient with my apparent slowness at times, but I did not like rushing my thoughts.  
"I think…My roses serve a purpose in making me happy, in seeing them bloom and thrive. I have no need in seeing them make anyone else happy, but they do so for me. Thus they serve a purpose."  
"In selfish happiness?" Salazar said, I looked up and smiled.  
"Who said it was selfish? Anyone is welcome to share in my happiness of them."  
"Well put, Helga." Godric said, draining his glass and pouring himself another measure.

"My second question, is paraphrasing what Helga said somewhat. 'Can we not enjoy the things we find the most rewarding?' and so, are the things we enjoy in life easy to come by or must we find them through hard work and strife?" Salazar asked.  
Rowena put down her spoon, "I believe it unfair to conjoin the phrase 'hard work' with strife. There is no need for the two to be paired. Hard work can be enjoyable and rewarding."  
Even Salazar conceded her point to be fair. Godric placed a large hand on his chin and rubbed it thoughtfully.  
"That is a good question. Many would have us believe the best moments in life are easy to find, yet whether that is true…Hmm, I think I would be in more favour to say nay. Life is challenging, but rightly so. Enjoyment stems through finding and pursuing what we desire, gaining and having the reward when done."  
"But if something is too difficult to gain or win over, then perhaps it is the wrong thing entirely." I said.  
"What do you mean by that Helga?" Rowena asked.  
"Well…sometimes…I…" I could feel myself getting flustered as all their gazes turned to look at me and I tried to recall what I had been going to say. Godric gently placed a hand on top of mine.  
"Your opinions are valid and well put, gather your thoughts, we shall wait."

I breathed a sigh and smiled a little, Godric's green eyes lit up and he gripped my hand a little tighter.  
"Will you always worry if your students present you with a question, Helga?" Salazar said. His lips were a thin line of displeasure and his eyes were narrowed, I saw them flicker down to Godric's hand resting on my own, then look back to my own.  
"Nay, of course I will do my best. But I find the example I shall use now uneasy."  
Godric put back his head and laughed then, "We must surely hear it now!"  
I nervously bit my lip, took another breath, then said, "My example is love…"  
I could feel my cheeks heat up once more, but I quickly took a sip of wine and continued, "Often I have seen men fall in love with women they have no hope in gaining the affection of, whether because of family disagreements or status or another reason entirely, sometimes just simple dislike on the part of the woman. Yet, if the man is kind and honourable, he may have another woman in love with him. He may easily win her heart and affection, warm and good as it is, but instead he spurns her…"

I tailed off, but Rowena and Godric nodded, Salazar looked deep in thought.  
"A fair point." Rowena said.  
"But is it not more honourable to seek his lady-love's affection?" Godric said.  
"If there is no hope in the matter and he will never gain her affection what then? If he wishes so much for love and companionship, surely he could learn to love the other woman's affection in time?" Rowena said.  
"Can love be learned?" asked Godric.  
"I have witnessed some arranged matches, turning to love within a few years." Rowena said, "Learned love is not an impossibility."  
"My point is to have something so near and so willing to be given; surely it is more a crime to ignore it? To never consider it?" I said.  
"In so many stories, they praise it when a man purses the object of his affection." Godric said.  
"Yet, we speak not of stories, but of reality. I believe it to be far more likely a man would give up his affection for the first woman and seek another, rather than to persist in seeking the foremost." Rowena said.  
"I concede that is more likely and true." Godric said.

Salazar suddenly leaned forward, his fingers pressed together and his eyes remaining fixed on mine, "Do you believe then, Madam Hufflepuff, love is not worth pursing?"  
"I…No, any pursuit of love is noble."  
"Then why do you believe that a man should forget what he truly longs for and instead takes another, the second best?"  
I fiddle with my napkin again and then look back up to him, "And what if the man did not realise what love that second woman could give him? That her love for him was far superior and more willingly given, than any false affection the first woman must pretend to give."  
"If you were in love with someone would you so willingly give them up? Would it be so easy to part company with them for another, however well they professed their love?"  
"I did not say that…I just think many overlook what they could have, in some desperate hope that their affection will be returned. You forget Salazar I saw daily trials of love, men in love with unobtainable women and women making sheep-eyes at men who…"

"Sheep-eyes?" Godric interrupted.  
"You know," I made my eyes wide and stared balefully at him, giving a little lover-lorn sigh while doing so. Godric gave another roaring laugh.  
"Ah yes, I'm well acquainted with that expression. I break far too many hearts."  
Rowena chuckled and gave Godric a withering look.  
"Anyway, sometimes when you are presented with such an image there is a desire to make things simple. To make people realise who they could be with, what love they could have…that in many ways they are wasting on another, who will never return their affection. In seeing all three parties suffer and no one find happiness…it is difficult not to wish something could be done." I finished; I considered it a rather lame ending to my argument, but I believed I had argued my point well enough.


	3. Green Grows the Lily O

 

Green Grows the Lily O 

Godric got up and stretched, Rowena stopped reading her book and looked up towards him.  
"Forgive me, Rowena. The hour grows late and I am tired."  
She neatly placed the bookmark back inside the pages and closed the cover. "You are right, it is late. I think we should all depart for bed." Rowena got up and placed the worn book under her arm. I confess I had not been listening well to the story she had told. The stories of Nimeuh and Morgan La Fey being common enough in my house, after all, they were Welsh tales. I tidied away the cloak I had been repairing and put the thread and needle into my sewing set. Salazar got up; picking the scrolls and documents he had been studying from the table. He went to the door and opened it, Godric beamed and clapped him on the shoulder.  
"Goodnight, Salazar."  
"Goodnight, friend."  
  
Godric kissed both Rowena and I on the cheek and bid us goodnight.  
"So the moon and sun depart to bed." he said.  
Rowena chuckled and jovially hit him with her book, "That's enough poetry from you."  
I hid a yawn behind my hand, not wanting to appear rude, but just feeling very tired.  
"Come, Helga is weary," Salazar moved over to me and put my arm on his, I was too tired and full of food to argue.

"I am perfectly able to go to my own rooms, Salazar." I said as we mounted the stairs towards my own chambers.  
"Forgive me for acting the gentleman."  
"It is late; you should depart to your own. I have no desire to keep you from them." I said, hiding another yawn.  
"I am not as tired as you and a few minutes from my bed shall not harm me." Salazar kept his eyes focused on the nearing doorway and my outer chambers. The room was cast in shadows, the fire in my grate having fallen low, the moonlight slipped between the heavy brocade of the curtains. He took me to the door, head kept lowered and when we reached the dark wood, he dropped my arm but lingered there.

"Salazar…are you well?"  
He rubbed the back of his neck, "Aye, quite well." he said, his voice sounding forced and pained. I reached out towards his arm, Salazar jolted away from my palm.  
"Salazar?" He momentarily closed his eyes as though my voice hurt him and shifted away when I tried to put my hand on his arm again. I dropped my arm by my side and sighed, I always found him strange and at times incomprehensible. His strange moods and long silences meant I was never at ease with Salazar.  
"Well goodnight." I said and he gave a small, formal bow and marched from my chambers. I shrugged and went into my own room. It no longer worried me greatly that I could not understand him.

* * *

I was lying underneath the warm sheets, the cover a similar colour to my cloak with my embroidery decorating the outside edge, patterns of golden daises and roses, I had attempted sewing four badges at the end without magic, but resorted to using it to stop them looking like dogs. My mind had troubled me for some time as to what Salazar had meant, but I had pushed the thought away and now let the warm comfort of my bed and the small fire in the grate lull me to sleep. I felt myself beginning to drift and the heaviness of dinner and working hard in my gardens encourage me, but then my mind suddenly pushed forth another image. It was strange, as though I was standing apart from myself, watching myself.

Salazar and I stood near the rosebush, his fingers holding onto my chin once more and though I was apart from myself, I could feel myself blush at the thought of his touch. Well that was ridiculous, I thought, why would his touch embarrass me? Nay, that was folly. It cannot solely be his; I easily blush at any gesture of kindness…Yet his was not a kind gesture, he had told me my face was too rounded. From this angle perhaps he was right, my face was definitely round, but not fat. I folded my arms over my chest and jutted my chin out proudly again. Until my face burned bright red and I opened my mouth in shock. He had lowered his head and kissed me/her. Well that did certainly not happen! Was this a dream or idle thought? Surely it could not be a dream, as I was aware of my being and that this was not a dream? Idle thought…no, it could not be that. I had no desire for that…but then I was thinking it. These were my thoughts in my head. Oh this was too complicated.

I opened my eyes and rolled over to the other side of the bed, my heart hammering in my chest. Little thoughts still creeping into my head. What would it be like to kiss him…this bed was too large and cold to lie in alone…what would it be like to be held against him. My cheeks flamed scarlet once more and I whispered furiously for my mind to shut up. I found it unnerving to look at Salazar as it was, day dreams of hurried kisses would not help things further. I scowled furiously and attempted to fall asleep, ignoring the temptation of going back to the memory of standing by wild roses and that ache I knew I had for him. We were too different. How could I even consider kissing someone who was so cold and apart from everything else? If he couldn't see the value of beauty, then love would be beyond such an understanding.

* * *

I dressed and ate hurriedly that morning; I did not eat with the others as I normally did. I claimed an early start was needed in order to examine the rarer plants in the herbology houses, a subject I was particularly looking forward to teaching when our students arrived. There was some truth in the matter, the Lovage, Fluxweed and the Flitterbloom all needed pruning and tending to. In all truth I did not wish to see Salazar, for I knew no matter what I did I would still feel flustered and embarrassed by what I had thought of last night. When I arrived in the warm, glass houses I excused the blush on my cheeks for the heat and kept my hands busy. But even with my mind devoted to the careful placement of manure, watering and pruning, occasional thoughts of Salazar's hands pressing on my stomach, his chest leaning against my back, his mouth…

"Oh now, Helga. Stop this. It is ridiculous. Of all the foolish notions…"  
"Though I doubt talking to yourself is any better." I nearly dropped the pot I was holding on hearing Salazar's voice. He smirked at my surprised expression and walked into the greenhouse.  
"You…you made me jump."  
"Forgive me, silent tread has been a fortitude of mine for many years. I have some need of Motherwort, if you have any to spare."  
"That's in herb patch number five."

I took off my gloves and picking up a pair of shears guided Salazar to the separated herb patches.  
"I was unaware we had so many herb patches." he said.  
"Seven in all, for each year." I said, he nodded. We reached herb patch number five and I had no difficulty in locating the Wort.  
"How much do you need?" I asked.  
"A couple of sprigs." I neatly cut the springs from the lower base and handed them up to him, he put them in his belt.  
"Where were you at breakfast? I asked Godric, but a sensible answer from that man is nigh on impossible." Salazar muttered.  
"I needed an early start, I did not have time for debates and I did not want to appear rude in leaving breakfast early. So I ate in the kitchen and then came out here."   
Salazar nodded and then a faint smile came to his lips, "You have dirt on your cheek."   
"Oh…" I blushed almost instantly and quickly went to brush it off, but Salazar caught my hand and drew it away. His thumb carefully stroked my cheek. It was as though his touch burnt me and I could feel my throat constrict slightly at the deft tracing of his hand.   
"There we go, Madam Peasant." I bit my lip and swallowed. I mustn't think of anything, if any of those thoughts came to my head…I did not want his touch or seek his affection, I was merely being foolish. I drew my head away from his firm hand and walked back to the greenhouses.

"Why do we always do this?" I heard him call to me.  
"Do what?" I turned to look at him, but when my gaze reached his eyes I looked down to my feet. I heard his steady tread up the path and then his hand under my chin, forcing me to look up at him. I blinked several times and cast my eyes away from his dark gaze.  
"Helga, look at me." he commanded. I tried to breathe evenly, but my stomach felt twisted into a knot and I could feel my heart slamming against my ribcage. "Look at me." Salazar's voice was cold and I finally lifted my eyes, his eyes hit mine and my mind swirled at his gaze. I staggered a little and his arm quickly came around my waist, but I did not feel any steadier with his palm resting on the small of my back.  
"Why do you always fly from me?" he whispered.  
"I don't." I muttered, shifting my gaze away again.  
"Do not lie to me." I heard the tremor of anger within his voice, even though it remained cool and steady. A chill ran through my spine and I shivered. Salazar moved closer towards me, the grasp of his arm tightening. If I went any nearer I would be pressed against his chest, his hips resting just above mine.

"I don't mean to…It's just we are all so busy and you…I never really thought I would hold much interest for you." I stammered.  
His lip curled upwards into a smile, "Nay, Helga. You fascinate me." he breathed and the hairs on the back of my neck stood up as the coolness of his voice trickled over my skin. "Godric, for all his bravado, appreciates book learning as much as Rowena and I. Yet you…How is it a witch can find such pleasure in such simple things? Hands caked in mud, weeding her garden, or baking bread and crafting stews in the kitchen."  
"I like reading…" I mumbled and was glad I only heard his snicker, instead of having to look upon the grim smile upon his face, "It is what I have always done, it is habit. I lived in a muggle village; after all, gardening and cooking could not be done by magic. I feared the risk of being interrupted by a muggle and having to explain how my carrots could chop themselves."  
"Yet why continue it now? It seems half wasteful when your talents could be spent on better things."  
I felt a slither of anger slide into my stomach, I fearlessly looked up, "I do not consider them wasteful. I take pride in nurturing my plants and those people around me. Now, if you would kindly let me go…"

He grasped me tighter to him and his hips jutted into mine, the slither of anger was replaced by a slither of desire. I felt a gasp pulled from my lips and heard his soft laugh.  
"Did I ever make mention to you, Helga, I am an accomplished Legilimens?"  
I felt my mouth drop open once more and I quickly shut it again, "You bluff."  
"Perhaps…you are quite easy to read. But shall I tell you of what I did last night?"  
"I have no need to find out." I muttered furiously and tried to pull away from his tight grip, when he did not let me go my hand went towards my belt. But he was too quick for me and grabbed my hand in his.  
"You'd draw your wand on me?"  
"No…Please Salazar, I have no desire for this."  
He drew nearer me, his body pressed against mine, his mouth inching closer to my ear, "I saw what you saw, I know full well what you desire…I have often found it enjoyable, lying with women and hearing them beg…" I took my chance and slapped him forcefully across the face, he staggered back and I couldn't quite believe I had had the nerve and gall to strike him.

"Don't you ever do such a thing to me again." I said, fury making my entire body shake and the grip on my wand tremble. I clung on tighter, trying to prevent my trembling looking like fear. His hand had lingered on his face and though his eyes glanced at his wand, I saw him decide against it. I almost ran up the hill and into the castle, making my way to my room and locking the door. My breathing was heavy but not from the quick pace I had taken up towards my chambers. I poured myself a glass of water and quickly drank it down; finding my throat relax and my heart begin to slow. I sat by my bed and pulled my cloak around me, taking comfort in the familiar warmth and the smell of Lily-of-the-Valley. I knew I was frightened, yet strangely drawn to him, desire bubbling up in my throat. I was scared of him and scared of desiring him.  
"No good can come of this." I muttered. I sat by the fire for a while, gazing into the flickering flames. I did think of going to the library, where Rowena would almost undoubtedly be, or back into the grounds. Yet I decided against it, the library was a favoured haunt of Salazar as well and although there was the chance Godric might be in the grounds, finding him would be another matter entirely.

I lingered in my rooms, safe and secure behind locked doors, until there was a gentle tap on the door and my entire body stiffened.  
"Helga?" his voice whispered through the wood. I remained still and quiet.  
He repeated my name again, "Helga? I know you are in here, please let me in." I did not make any movement towards the door. I heard him inhale deeply as though the words pained him to say them.  
"I am here to apologise…I should not have threatened you like that within the grounds." I drew my wand out and muttered the incantation to release the door, it swung open and Salazar stood there. He at least looked repentant.  
"I am sorry." he muttered.  
"You frightened me." I said boldly, he lowered his head and dug his thumbs into his belt. I turned to look at the fire once more and he approaches me, his footfall heavy on the wooden floor. I nervously shift away from him and he looks ashamed once more. It is a strange expression on his face and although I have seen it in a milder form, this one is of true shame. He kneels beside me and gently takes my hand in his.

"What I have done is…is foul and unkind, I would never wish for you to fear me. I would ask for forgiveness, though I know in many ways this crime is unforgivable." He raises the knuckles of my hand to his lips and kisses them; I am surprised how firm the gentle kiss seems. His eyes glance up to mine and I sigh and look away. I am torn, his bid to gain my forgiveness should earn it…yet why does my heart fear such an act? I press my lips together, yet when I look at him I know instantly that I must. There is none of the usual coldness or malicious teasing within them; he would never seek this forgiveness with anyone else.  
"I forgive you, just promise me you won't ever do that again and if you can perform…Legilimency you will not use it against me again."  
"I swear it." I frown a little at his unusual declaration, but he swiftly rises to his feet and gives me a well-practiced bow. I get up myself and stow away my wand.  
"We shall not speak of this to the others; it would be better that way." I say, he gives that restrained smile once more.  
"Good, I am glad to hear it."

We stand in silence once more, his careful, dark eyes watching me…his expression almost one of observation.  
"Did you make use of the Motherwort? It will wilt otherwise." I ask and his smirk returns.  
"Alas, that was merely an excuse."  
I frown, "For what?"  
"For this," his hand reaches to my cheek and I stop myself from flinching, but I cannot stop my gasp when he lowers his head and softly grazes my lips with his. His skin is warm and for a moment he rests his forehead against mine, slowly breathing a sigh on my lips. I long for more kisses almost as soon as he draws his mouth away and I was grateful for the bedpost behind me. I curse myself for it, but I cannot help the small whimper fall from my lips. Salazar smiles easily and walks away from me towards the door.  
"I will see you at dinner." he says before he leaves. I mutely bow my head, unsure of what I should say. His lips burned my mouth; the twisting in my stomach has become a desperate ache. I want him.


	4. The Flickering Flames

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for the delay, but I have genuinely been busy. This chapter is smutty in the extreme, you have been warned!

If I couldn't bear gazing at Salazar for long periods of time before, now it is nigh on impossible to even glance at him at dinner. Rowena embarrassed me further by asking if I was well or whether the fire was banked too highly.  
"Nay Rowena, I am well. The fire is fine and I would not wish to discomfort you…"  
"It is fine, Helga." Godric flicks his wand at the fire and the flames die a little, Salazar lights some more candles for us to see better. He pours a glass of water and hands it to me.  
"I think it is not illness, the wine is rich this evening and I believe Helga has drunk it a little too quickly." Salazar smirks and casts me a hidden look, his eyes dark. I busy myself with the water goblet and drink deeply; I nearly let out a small squeak when I feel Salazar's hand softly glide up my leg; burning heat courses through my veins. I surreptitiously pry away his hand, but he captures it in his, the thumb gently circling over my knuckles. I bite my lower lip and drink my water again. I glare at him, but he blithely ignores my angry glance and continues conversing with Godric on the best way to seek council and agreement with the Centaurs.

"Rowena I think you may be right, I do confess to feel a little ill. I think I will depart to bed." I say, standing up and successfully pulling my hand away from Salazar's grasp.  
"Oh very well, my dear. I hope you feel better by the morning." she said, gently embracing me.  
"Do you wish for me to accompany you?" Godric asked, already rising from his seat.  
"No Godric, I will cope well enough. My room is not so far from here. I bid you all goodnight."  
"Call upon us if you feel worse." Godric says.  
I laugh softly, "It is only a little tiredness and sickness, I will be well by morning, I assure you. Salazar is probably right; the wine made matters no better."

I note with a little pride Salazar looks frustrated and offended by my lie, but his presence was making me feel too dizzy to comprehend anything within this room. I give a swift curtsey and leave for my room, sighing with relief when I do so. I can feel my head grow clearer and my breathing become deeper, unlike the shallow breaths I took when I saw his look upon me. I may not have known a man, but tavern work has taught me the looks of all men and women and his was one I'd seen upon many men. It was a look of nothing but pure, unadulterated desire, the heat from his eyes so strong I was surprised Rowena and Godric did not even notice it.

I poured the stream of water into a bowl and sunk the cloth into the cold water, gleaming in soft moonlight and the silver of the bowl. I was so tired from feeling heated and his strange lust frightened me. I let rivulets of water run down my neck and face, cooling my skin and with the windows open sending cold shivers running over my body. I had pulled the windows open as soon as I had entered my room and the cold air, smelling of the pine trees and heather, blew through, sending ripples through the curtains and making my nightgown whip around my feet. As I pressed a towel to my face and neck, the wind blew too strongly and my candle went out. I let out a little cry of surprise, but then shook myself and lit it once more. As I picked it up and turned, I jumped when I saw Salazar smiling at me. I had not heard him enter the room. He shook his head and tutted, then began to close my windows.

"You will get ill if you wash while cold wind pours through your chambers." he pulled the drapes firmly over my windows, till there was only my candle for light. Salazar flicked his wand at the fireplace and the log burst into flames.  
"You did not knock." I finally said.  
He neared me, lip curling up and he gave a chuckle.  
"Is that what most worries you, Madame Peasant? That I forgot my manners."  
He took the candle from my grasp and placed it upon the table by my bed. With great care and precision he deftly touched my collarbone and I felt those well-known shivers run through me again.

"Salazar…" I whispered, it had meant to sounds sterner and my attempt to push him away from me, however frail; but instead my voice sounded husky and thick, as though I desired him…Nay, not 'as though' for I knew I did. His eyes flickered up to mine and he did not break his gaze as his finger slowly drew a line down my neck towards the soft lacing of my gown. I felt my breath hitch when his finger strayed between my breasts. Salazar's eyes were drawn to my chest and his hand lingered there. I cleared my throat and his eyes instantly went back to mine, in that look I could feel my legs shaking and I knew if I didn't grab hold of something, either him or the bed, there was a good chance I would embarrass myself and collapse.

"Salazar…" I tried again, shame catching hold of my tongue and stopping my speech. Those eyes looked as though they could reach the very soul of me, my very existence, revealing every truth and every lie of my being. It was both frightening and exhilarating. He very quickly pushed an arm round my waist and I could feel myself sag in his grip, my legs entirely useless. I could have screamed in frustration at my stupidity and uselessness.  
"Will you give yourself to me?" he murmured, his lips so close to my cheek I could feel his warm breath against my skin.  
Desire welled in my belly, I could scarcely speak.  
"Well?" he said.  
"I can't…" I finally managed.  
"Why?" he asked, no cajoling or gentleness within his voice.  
"I am…I have not…"  
He leaned back a little, a smug smile upon his lips, "You have not lain with a man before?"  
I mutely shook my head and he laughed, the cold sound filling my chambers, before his eyes turned back towards me and hungrily took in every curve and part of my body.  
"Then I will be your best and your first."

It was almost too rough, but he pulled me against him and pushed his lips on mine. His mouth hot and heavy, barely giving me chance to breathe as he nipped and suckled on my mouth. I could feel my mind almost begin to drift as every inch of my skin longed for him, desired his touch all over my heat. I wanted his coolness to quench my thirst; the warmth was making me dizzy. His kiss was demanding and as soon as I had opened my lips just a little he seized his chance and pushed his tongue into my mouth. It almost shocked me and first and my eyes shot open at the intrusion, but it was nice in a way and I grew to like his tongue flickering over my own. I could feel my arms wrap around his shoulders and his free hand grip the back of my head, a handful of hair within his grasp, his other arm still holding tightly to my waist. I no longer even cared when I moaned wantonly into his mouth, I felt his shudder of longing and he pushed me back to the bed. My legs gave way as soon as my knees hit the end of the bed and he swiftly followed me, near pulling me up the bedspread, till my head lay on the pillow and Salazar hovered over me, I longingly reached up towards his chest. He pressed himself into my hips and I could feel underneath his breeches his body responding to his own desires. His fingers once more traced the line of my collar, the curve of my breasts, my breath shallow and rapid as his touch drew nearer towards my nipples. Ever teasingly he drew his hand away, that satisfied smirk back on his lips. He lowered his head towards my chest.

"I've thought about this ever since we met…ever since I saw that wench with her honey hair tied up in a loose knot, roses in her cheeks…I thought of making your eyes gleam with longing for me."

I was only half listening to him, as he roamed my chest, his teeth gently scraping and then biting my flesh, little red marks and purple bruises smattering my collarbones. I felt his tongue flick out and play with the silk ties of my gown. His eyes were so concentrated and busy, I pulled up my hand and ran it through his hair; thick, dark locks snaring between my fingers. He lifted himself up a little and grasped my hand in his, his mouth at once sucking and kissing my palm. I saw his dark smile as he stopped his kissing and reached down to caress my mouth, his hand tracing around my lips. I closed my eyes in bliss, feeling his hand draw my mouth open. I look up to him again with surprise, his fingers pushing into my mouth, urging me to suck on them. He gives a soft groan when I do, his other hand tightly squeezes my breast and my hips buck up into him. Oh I want him; I want him within my legs, his hands pressing against my flesh, moulding me to his ways. A cry that almost sounds angry escapes him and I feel my blood freeze a little when he withdraws his wand, but he places it on the laces of my nightgown and at once little sparks of fire burn away the thin nightdress, leaving no mark on my skin or hurting me in anyway. His eyes are greedy and desperate, once more taking in my naked form. Salazar pushes away the wand and I hear it clatter on the floor, I am honoured by his willingness with me, he is defenceless now.

His hands curve around my breasts, full and heavy in his hands. He smiles.  
"I've thought about these, lying with you and holding these creamy, white breasts. But my thoughts are nothing compared to their real beauty."  
"I have been told my figure is too full, too womanly to be desired." I want to hear him defend my body, praise its worth; but he makes not a word and places his mouth on my neck, he bites the flesh hard till I let out a torn moan, half of pleasure and pain. He raises his head again.  
"Do not seek flattery from me, Helga. You are better than that. You are not, by any means, Rowena. Slim and lithe, elegant…your lips are only red when I bite them. I would be a fool not to believe Rowena is beautiful. But she is too cold for my tastes…"  
"Too cold? I would have thought that suited you perfectly." I said, I do not know where the strength to speak had come from, but I felt strangely emboldened by his obvious desire for me.  
"As would I…yet instead, what I desire is you!" Salazar seems half surprised at his own choosing, "You with your earthy, simple ways. You chose a badger, for heaven's sake, as your emblem!"

I glare at him and my anger is heady and mixed, passion and desire and hatred...I pull him down next to me and swiftly bite his neck. His hands jolt away from my body in shock and I feel an intense pleasure in knowing I can shock and overwhelm him as much as he can to me. But he soon seizes my waist and pushes me tightly against him. I do not let him have the pleasure of seeing my surprise of being so near his engorged penis. I run my hands through his hair and hold him down on the pillows, while I bit and nip at his mouth, before grazing his Adam's apple with my teeth. I unfasten the ties of his tunic, pushing the fabric away and almost ripping the fine shirt underneath, I splay my fingers on the warm skin, gently toying with the curls on his chest. He pulls away the tunic and undershirt, the smell of him: parchment, ink, musk, man. His leg tackles mine and rolls me onto my back again; he grips my arms and holds me against the bed. I try to struggle under his grip, but he will not relent.

Salazar chuckles softly, "When did you become so wanton?"  
I glare at him again, "It is well known badgers are omnivores and they can easily kill snakes."  
His smile broadens, "Can they indeed?" but he silences my answer with another kiss. He pulls his weight off me and carefully runs a hand down my body towards my legs; his hand drifts over my belly, towards the hair between my legs. I clamp them together tightly and he gives a laugh, softly kissing me by my throat, no more biting.

"Open your legs." he murmurs. I feel my cheeks heating up again as his fingers stroke down my thighs and then back up to my hips. Salazar raises himself to look at me, before placing a firm kiss on my mouth.  
"I won't do anything yet, I just want to feel how ready you are."  
"How do you know I'm ready?" I say and he laughs again, but it is infinitely gentler than his usual mocking sneer.  
"I don't. Open your legs and we will know."  
I gaze up at him, wanting to know if he speaks the truth, but when he remains looking intently at me I finally open my legs and his hand dips between the folds of flesh.

"Oh God…" I mutter, as his hand is covered in my wetness and he strokes o so slowly up and down the warm flesh. I ball my hands into fists and try to remain still on the bed, fighting the urge to moan as his clever fingers gently rub against my nub, sometimes quickening their pace, sometimes drawing down so slowly I want to scream. He suddenly stops and I open my eyes.  
"Why did you stop?" I ask, he gives a lazy shrug. I glare at him again.  
"This…" here he slowly draws one finger down my wet folds and I press my lips tightly together, "Does not seem to be causing you much pleasure; I thought it best to stop."  
I bite my tongue and he languidly strokes up my leg, brushing my hip, my waist, once more drawing circles around my breasts.  
"It did…" I mutter, glancing away from his eyes. He rolls on top of me again, but lifts his hip up a little and taking my hand makes me grasp the hardness in his breeches. He pushes against it and lowers his mouth near my ear, running his tongue over the sensitive rim.  
"I want to hear you. I want to hear you panting and moaning, begging me to fuck you. I want my name on your lips. I want to claim you." He gets up and for a moment of sheer panic I think he is leaving, but he unties the laces on his breeches and shoves them over his hips.

His skin is pale, but the hair by his crotch is dark. I barely know if I should look at it or ignore it entirely, I cast away my eyes and hear him climb back on the bed.  
"It is only another body part, Helga." he says, as he lies tantalisingly close by my side.  
"It is a very intimate body part." I whisper, trying to keep my eyes away from his. He chuckles and takes my hand once more; I clench it into a fist, but he presses it flat with his own hand and then I feel his…  
"What is it like?" he asks.  
"Embarrassing." I cry and he gives such a broad laugh it would not be unmistakable on Godric.  
"Nay, I mean what does it feel like?"

I cautiously move my hand over the smooth head, down the shaft into the thick, curled hair.  
"Soft and firm." I sneak a little look down and it does not seem so frightening now. I look back up to his willing smile. His hand rests firmly on mine and he draws my hand up to the tip again and then back down. He repeats the motion a few times.  
"That feels so good," he hisses into my ear, "Maybe you were right, muggle work has roughened your hands." He thrusts more firmly into my hand, before withdrawing. I blush.

"Now then, let me see what I may do for you." His fingers dip within my folds and I cannot help the moan pulled from my lips. He rubs along my wetness, becoming quicker and firmer. I give up. I groan and feel my body spiralling towards the culmination of desire; he presses his mouth against mine and kisses me. I am half aware of him positioning his body above mine and the tip of the penis pressing against my flesh. Then before I can reach the peak of my desire he pushes into me, the sharp sting forcing my eyes open and I let out a muffled cry as his hips slam into mine. I feel tears well up in the corners of my eyes. I wonder if this is right and whether I should have let this happen, he seems so intent on his own pleasure. I am a forgotten body beneath. But he looks up to me, his breathing heavy.

"Open your legs wider, it will hurt less." he says gruffly. I do so, still feeling plundered and vulnerable; he takes in my expression and then gently kisses me.  
"I know it hurts, but it will not do so for long. And when we next make love it will be infinitely more pleasurable than this time."  
I manage a chuckle, "Who says there will be a next time?"  
His smile returns and my heart sings with delight on seeing it, no bitterness or hatred or mockery, just a pure and simple smile.  
"You were too wanton this time, not to want another time." He lies closer to me and I wince at the slight pain from his deeper position. But he wraps his arms tightly around me and presses kisses on my cheeks and lips. He gives another thrust.  
"Next time I will bring you pleasure. You feel so good to me right now, so hot and tight and wet…how could I not return the favour?"  
He begins a steady rhythm and even now it begins to feel better. He urges me to raise my hips and he groans furiously into my hair, breathing in my scent.

"Oh forgive me, I cannot help this…" he cries out, and I wonder what he means, when he suddenly pushes furiously into me, the growing pleasure I felt now being mixed with pain. He thrusts several times more and then his body shudders as he releases inside me. He falls back to me, his face and body damp with sweat, his chest rising and falling, his eyes closed. I gently push back the dark hair clinging to his forehead and kiss his cheek. Salazar smiles contentedly and opens his eyes. He kisses me fully on the mouth.

"That was perfect. I had dreams of you for months on end and nothing could compare to this." Salazar lifts himself up and then fetches the basin of water. I am still surprised by his tenderness when he washes around my thighs and the delicate crotch.  
"Oh, blood…" It shocks me a little to see the dark red stains on the cloth.  
"Only a little, Helga, and you will not bleed again."  
He washes himself and then puts the bowl back. I feel a dull ache in my heart when he puts on his undershirt.  
"You are going?" I say, not hiding the look of disappointment on my face. He gives that teasing smile.  
"Nay, your room is still cold from the windows being open and though I am warm, I have no desire to catch a chill." Salazar pulls the cover away from the bed and climbs in; he wraps his arm around my waist, so I am cocooned in his warm embrace, his chest behind me. He pulls the cover up to my shoulder and softly kisses me. Although I gained little pleasure in the act, I feel strangely fulfilled and complete. I stroke his arm and Salazar kisses my forehead, I hear his sigh of contentment as he lies back on the pillows.

I do not fear him now, now he has revealed his true nature to me. I would not say I trust him entirely, but in truth I realise he masks his fears through his arrogance and I can learn to live with that. I am not as weak as some make out, his malicious teasing or quick remarks have never driven me to tears, but they do frustrate me at times. But I think I understand him a little better now. Not fully, but a little. He has shown me he can be kind, thoughtful, even loving. Yet I do not expect him to treat me any differently in the morn, but that does not matter. I fall asleep.


	5. White Rose

I woke alone, the other side of the bed lingering with his scent and a small indent in the pillow being the only clues left as to what we had done. I rolled to my side and inhaled deeply, caressing the warmth of the pillow. He had only left moments ago. Perhaps I was disappointed, but not surprised. I stretched and got up. When I pulled back the cover there were small marks of blood spotting the sheets, I felt strangely guilty when I muttered "Tergeo" and the traces of blood vanished. I pressed my palm to the now snow-white sheet. He would not want anyone to know, not even Wynny. I quickly got washed and dressed, then went down to the dining room.

Godric was the only one in there when I arrived.  
"Morning Helga." he beamed and poured me a cup of tea.  
"Morning Godric. Where are Rowena and Salazar?"  
"Could have asked you the same question yesterday…" he said.  
"I had things to attend to."  
Godric began to butter a roll and then pulled a pot of honey over, "As do they, both of them are busy in the library."  
"Already?" I asked.  
"Aye, Rowena had time for breakfast, though she wolfed it down. Salazar only stopped in here for tea, then went on his way."

I frowned at that, I forever had to remind Rowena to eat when she became too busy with her studies. It was a part of our childhood I had grown up with, Rowena's mother often charged me with the duties of fetching Rowena from whatever chair she had found, and pulling her away from the book she was engrossed with, to eat. Godric laughed on seeing my expression.  
"You can mother them in a moment, when you've eaten your own breakfast."  
I rolled my eyes and he passed me the basket of warm rolls. Godric did not speak for a few moments, while I busied myself in buttering the rolls on my plate. He took a sip of tea and then turned back to me, his expression worried.  
"What is it?" I asked.  
Godric pinched the bridge of his nose, "There's been another spate of burnings and some attacks from wizards on muggles in the South, I…I am intending to go there and try to help in some way."  
I put down my cup.  
"Godric…" I began reproachfully, for he knew well the dangers such an undertaking would bring and the worry for the rest of us.  
"I know what you will say, for Rowena has already said it: What can I do, I am one man amongst many? I will probably cause further damage; I dumbly risk my own life…etc, yet I cannot sit here and do nothing."

I bit my lip, of course we all wished to do something, but in the saving of one witch or wizard – even muggles mistaken for witches or wizards – often more were harmed or killed. Angry villagers would seek revenge on family, friends or neighbours. Vengeful witches and wizards made matters no better. I had been fortunate in finding the village of Caerleon, a rare place where muggles and wizards coexisted. There was occasional anger and frustration, particularly on our part if muggle-borns were forced from their homes. In the small school I had ran there were a few runaways and those who had been abandoned, but they tended to come from towns further away. There had never been a time of bloodshed. After all, the great wizard Merlin had hailed from there.

"Godric, you know it to be futile to rescue anyone from the stake or already held in gaol. It would further their wrath…"  
His brow furrowed and he glared at the table, I got up and gently squeezed his shoulder, "Just try to bring the others to a place of safety and keep yourself safe."  
He smiled at that and tenderly placed his hand on top of mine, "For your sake I will."  
"Hogwarts needs all of its four founders." I said and Godric finished the roll on his plate and got up.  
"When do you leave?" I asked.  
"As soon as I am packed and able to."  
I nodded, "If you need to use my house as a place of safety you can do so, but I shall send a note to Alys first and tell her what you intend."  
Godric's smile returned and he seized my hand in his, he pressed it to his lips, "You are a goodly woman to have amongst us. God knows we would continually fight and argue were you not here."  
I smiled, "Nay, Rowena would not accept fighting; it would distract her from her work."  
Godric laughed at my joke, "Well I hope I shall return to your beef stew and thickly crusted bread, it is a favourite of mine. I will bid you all goodbye when I am ready." And with that he marched from the room.

I grabbed a scrap of parchment and a quill, quickly scribbling a note to Alys informing her of making up beds for the children and preparing a good amount of food, I said I would send them more should they need it. I made my way to the owlery and attached the note to my barn owl, Pollux.  
"This needs to get to Alys, as quickly as you can. You know she likes being prepared." I gently stroked Pollux's feathers and he nibbled at my fingers affectionately before flying off through the window and up into the blue expanse of the sky. It was such a fair day it was hard to believe such hatred and anger had occurred. I sighed and turned to the door, Salazar stood there, he looked grim.  
"Godric told you then?"  
"Yes." I murmured, "I've sent a note to Alys telling her to prepare my house for an influx of guests." I smiled faintly at the weak jest. Salazar crossed the room and looked out of the window, his frown still etched on his face.

"My father will not have the scum in his house." he said so quietly I could have easily misheard his words. I decided I would not say anything; Salazar would already be in a foul mood in the death of good witches and wizards, yet he disliked being reminded many muggles would die beside our fellows. He turned round to look at me, I was still watching him.  
"You begrudge me the sentiment." he said and came towards me, a faint smile on his lips. I could feel my eyes drawn to his lips, he had quite a full mouth and I felt a dawning ache in wanting to kiss them. I shrugged.  
"You know I do, but we must agree to differ on this matter." I said.  
He chuckled coldly at that, "You would seek agreement when we have none."  
"Tis better that way or else we live in strife."  
"Aye and you look very beautiful this morning."

He pressed his mouth to mine and I sank easily into the bliss of his rare affection. His arm captured my waist again and he pushed me back into the doorway. He trailed his mouth over my lips and neck, inhaling against the curve of my neck.  
"You smell good. You smell of sex."  
I bit my lip as desire lit in my belly again. Salazar knew that, despite the soreness between my legs, if he asked I would let him have me. He brought his kiss back up to my mouth and then smiled at me.  
"But I am not as cruel as that. I will let you recover a little further." He rests his forehead against mine, "In this dark time you bring me some relief."  
"Do not be angered." I begged. Salazar grunted in reply.

"You have not told Godric or Rowena about this?" he says a moment later.  
"About what?"  
He scowls, "What happened last night."  
"No…Why, are you ashamed of it?" I felt a bubble of anger grow in my chest. He draws away from me and glares at me.  
"Well thank you for thinking so little of me! Nay, I am just not one for vainly strutting around like a peacock, proudly declaring my conquests." His lip curled into a sneer, but then his face softened a little and he gently touched my cheek, "Will you blame me so for desiring to keep this between us? I am not ashamed of you Helga; I would not sleep with you if that were the case."  
I rolled my eyes, "You are honest to a fault, when you decide to speak." I mutter, he smirked.  
"Yes, I've been told that is a virtue of mine as well as a flaw. Am I pardoned for my secrecy?"  
"Yes…I just wanted to be sure."  
"Of what?"  
"That I wasn't just some meaningless conquest."  
His proud little smile returned, "Oh my Helga, you could never be that."

I left him after that, making my way down the long staircases to the library. Rowena was already seated by a desk, the wooden surface covered in a multitude of scrolls, books and Rowena's own notes. Rowena's head was bent, her quill busy scrawling across a piece of parchment and now and then she would mutter softly to herself. When she heard my footsteps she looked up and smiled.  
"Good morning, Helga."  
"Godiden." I replied and she laughed at the expression. Rowena was fond of strange sayings and she found it very amusing when I spoke Welsh to her. Her smile faded a little and she gestured to the seat beside her.  
"Godric has gone to the South."  
I nod, "Yes, he told me this morning. Witch-burnings." I shivered, "I just sent an owl to Alys, so she can prepare some rooms and food for them."  
Rowena nodded, "Hogwarts will be used as well, would you be able to see to the Great Hall as a place for them to sleep?"  
"Of course."

Rowena put down her quill and stretched, then reclined back in her chair.  
"Salazar is in a foul mood, of course." she said. I nervously bit my lip and she gave a momentary puzzled frown, "Though less so than usual…I'd go so far to say he was practically mild mannered at breakfast, well at least until we heard the news from Gwaine."  
"Is Gwaine safe?" I asked, glad I could change the subject so easily onto Godric's brother.  
"Yes, the Gryffindors are rarely touched by these matters, though of course they're helping as many as they can."

We lapsed into silence; Rowena rolled her quill between her fingers. I smiled gently at her and was about to get up and pick up a book on Runes when she suddenly snapped her fingers and pointed at me.  
"You're different too."  
"Different?" I frowned, my hands smoothing down my dress.  
Rowena nodded slowly, "Yes. Different…I don't know what it is, but there is something changed about you."  
"What are you talking about?" I said, though regretted it slightly as it sounded defensive, "I'm not in any way changed."  
She shrugged, "I don't know, I can just tell. You're different."  
"Very well…"I muttered and picked up the small, leather bound book from the shelf. A rune intricately decorated the front cover and around the sides small runes were painted on in gold. I sat back down, though Rowena kept looking at me.  
"Rowena, that's very distracting." I said. She gave a sigh and turned back to her own work, though now and then I felt her gaze drift towards me.


	6. Thou Shalt Not Suffer a Witch to Live

As the evening approached there was no time for reading or studying. Families of wizards and witches began arriving, having followed Godric up from the lower grounds towards the castle. Most bore expressions of worry and confusion, as if they were not sure how they had arrived in such a place. The house elves and myself were kept busy with the making of beds and handing out of hot food. We had decided to turn the Great Hall into something of an encampment; it would be easier for relatives to find one another were they all in the same place. Rowena came down and began compiling a list of everyone who had arrived that day, marking down the names of families and their original whereabouts. 

Even those who had been accused of no crime were brought up to the Castle; friends and neighbours who bore no guilt other than to know the person who had been blamed. I was relieved when Godric told me he was taking muggles to his family’s home and that of mine, he scowled but I said it was for the best and to bring them here would only incur Salazar’s anger. Those who had arrived were quiet and subdued, but Salazar could stir things up and then there would be a spate of attacks from wizards on muggles, which would help no one in the end.

From passing around the huddled groups I learnt that several Priests and armed guards had been stirring up trouble, at first it seemed best to ignore it, but a sudden bate of hangings and strange murders meant the angry mutterings and hysterical rants of the Priests, were no longer easy to laugh off. It pained me to see the wizard and witches’ quiet faces; even the children were pale and sat silently. Children should not be like that, I thought as I handed round blankets, they should be running all over the place, causing a mess, shouting and laughing. Not these little ghosts, sitting so quietly it was as though they were terrified to even breathe. Even though I disliked Salazar’s viewpoint at times, I could understand his abhorrence of muggles.

At that moment Godric interrupted my thoughts by staggering into the hall, the weight of an injured man on his shoulders, the wizard’s family rushing around him. I cleared a nearby bed and examined the man’s wounds, gashes with a frightening amount of blood and some smaller cuts, but nothing that essence of dittany wouldn’t cure. I called Rowena to my side and asked her to keep the family calm and to bathe the man’s wounds, while I headed down the stairs to Salazar’s office. I managed to catch up with Godric before he left; his eyes were dark with shadows beneath, shoulders hunched and he did not loosen his hand upon the sword at his belt.  
“Godric…”  
“There is no time, Helga. There are still more, my father and brother are still out there with our friends, trying to help many as they can…”  
“But it will serve you no purpose, if you or your family are injured.” I said. He gave a low, deep sigh.  
“I cannot rest, not until this has been seen to.”  
“Godric it will not end for another hundred years, if not more.”  
“Then neither I, nor my family, will ever rest until both muggles and wizards can sleep peacefully in their beds.”  
“Will you not at least take some respite or have something to eat?” I asked, he smiled gently and put his hand over mine, where it rested on his sleeve.  
“Not yet, when the worse is over, I swear to you I shall. Now, go to Salazar and fetch that potion, that man has suffered enough.” With that he turned on heel and headed out into the darkness again.

I sighed, but there was nothing more I could do, I knew it was futile to argue with Godric. When he had a goal or task in mind there was very little that could sway him from that path and my pleas to get some food into him would not be one of those reasons. I continued my way down to the darkened rooms, going deeper into the castle. I found Salazar’s office, the heavy oak door shut and only the faint scratching sounds of a pen from inside. I knocked, the pen fell silent and then I heard Salazar made his way to the door. He opened it, looking disgruntled and sour, but as soon as he saw me his expression relaxed a little and he pulled me into the room.  
As usual he favoured his dark green drapes and heavy wooden furniture, the desk took up most of the room, and like Rowena’s each book, pen and scrap of paper had its correct place, there was not a feather out of place on his quills and the books on the desk were in neat piles. Around the room were tall bookshelves, lined with leather bound books, some even in Latin, Greek and Hebrew. There was a small chest towards the end of the room, near the windows, where I presumed Salazar kept his potions. I had taken a few steps into the room and heard Salazar close the door, I turned to ask him for the dittany, but he grabbed my arm and forced me back against the door. I was about to exclaim the importance of my task, but he kissed me, not giving me barely a moment to gain breath. His mouth on mine felt so sweet and strong, his lips urging mine open and then that warm slip of tongue into my mouth; I resisted the urge to moan and pushed him back.

“I need essence of dittany, a man is injured.” I said panting, embarrassed it was so easy for him to take my breath.  
He strode over to the chest and removed a small crystal bottle. Then turned to give it to me, but held it just out of reach.  
“You do understand, don’t you?”  
“Salazar, I…”  
“Were I in that hall I would not prevent my anger, I do you more of a service by being here than fuming in there.”  
I gently touched his cheek, “I know that and we have more than enough house elves to attend everyone, but I must see to this man’s injuries.”  
He nodded and put the potion in my open palm, “After you are done will you come to speak with me?” he said.  
“Perhaps, but there are many people I need to attend to, including Godric.”  
“Well do not forget yourself, I can tell you are weary. But go, I will not keep you anymore.”  
I reached up on tiptoes and kissed his cheek; he seemed to like it and smiled. I gave him an encouraging smile and then ran back up the stairs, the bottle clutched tightly in my hand. I felt his eyes upon me still as I mounted the stairs, but when I turned the corner and glanced back he had quietly closed the door.

I attended to the man, his wounds knitting together and healing before our eyes. Rowena and his wife had cleaned most of his blood away and I lent him one of Godric’s shirts while his was cleaned. It was dawn before the last few refugees came and Godric returned for good, Rowena’s face paled on seeing the lines of worry etched on his face, the tiredness deep within his eyes. He barely spoke a word, wolfed down a plate of stew, bread and ale, before falling asleep in his chair. Rowena had not the heart to wake him, nor to disturb him with a levitation charm, so we covered him with a thick blanket and left him there to rest. Rowena bid me goodnight after that, though by now the sun was creeping over the horizon, even the sun looked weak and weary climbing over the hills with no glorious signs of red or gold, though I remembered the old saying, ‘Red sky at night, witches’ delight. Red sky dawning, wizard’s warning.’ So perhaps it was just as well.

I was making my way along the main staircase, debating whether to visit Salazar or retire for a few moments when he appeared walking down from the second floor. ‘Whether that man does practice occlumency or no, he certainly knows when to find me.’ I thought. He came towards me and wrapped his arms around me, he looked strangely tender as he did so.  
“I thought you would be too weary for long conversation, so do you mind if I could join you in your bed?” he asked.  
“I am too weary for anything…physical.” I blushed, he gave a small chuckle.  
“The thought did not even pass through my mind.” Salazar’s eyes gleamed.  
I huffed, “As if.”  
He gave me a short kiss to my forehead, “I would not be such a beast as that to make demands on you, especially when you have worked ceaselessly. Come. Bed.” And he guided me back down the staircase to my own room.

 

He took off his shirt when he lay in my bed this time and helped me unlace my dress, pulling it up over my head, his eyes raking over my body before I put on my night dress, but I did not want to tempt him. I was too tired even if he was gentle or slow, which I doubted he would be. He climbed into the bed and then pulled me down beside him, wrapping his arms around my shoulders and waist, the cover drawn over my shoulders. I closed my eyes, breathing in the warm scent of him, as he ran a hand through my hair, slowly rubbing my scalp. I fell asleep in minutes, but for the few moments I was awake I relished the comfort and security of him holding me tightly to him.

I woke as he shifted my body over to the other side of the bed and went to the window.  
“Where are you going?” I asked, he turned and came back to the bed and sweetly cupped my cheek.  
“I’m not going anywhere. But it sounds like you have an owl.” He nodded to the window, where the bird began rapping against the pane with his beak. Salazar pulled open the curtain and then opened the window, where Alys’ owl Castor instantly flew in and proffered his leg. I undid the string biding it and then he hopped to the end of the bed post, put his head under his wing and promptly fell asleep. Salazar closed the window again and shut the curtains; he climbed back into bed, while I opened the letter. I read it while he nuzzled up to my hip, kissing the soft fabric and making it very tricky to concentrate on Alys’ words.

But the pain of last night and the storms of witchcraft accusations were not healed by simple kisses and it hurt to read her letter; Alys’ had taken most of the muggles, as had Lord Gryffindor and there were around thirty altogether in both houses. There were a few witches and wizards, making fifteen there and forty here. But despite all our efforts there had been the cost of many innocents, killed when their families or friends had gone missing, without trial or a court. We had two new orphans at my house of Rhosyn melyn, a boy of seven and a girl of ten. I sighed and scrunched the letter tightly up in my hand, there were times when my patience and even temper were tried and I could have easily hated muggles with as much vengeance as Salazar. But unlike he, Godric or Rowena I would still not do anything about it other than help the victims; despite all of Godric’s claims, his pride and sense of justice would often make him angry with the muggles and I knew in many ways Rowena saw witches and wizards as superior. But I could not do that, because every person deserves the chance to be good, for all the wrong they have done before. Even my own sense of pity and forgiveness frustrated me at times.

“You are troubled.” Salazar murmured against my waist, I put the letter down and sank back into the bed.  
“Let’s not talk of it today, it will only anger you and upset me.” I said. He wriggled back up to the pillows and kissed my neck.  
“How many?” he said.  
“Salazar,” I whined, not wishing to feel his anger, even if it was not directed at me.  
“How many?”  
I bit my lip, “Altogether, around seventy saved.”  
His hand tightened on the bed cover and I soothingly stroked his shoulder. I saw his jaw clench and his eyes look away from my own.  
“You were right; you should not have told me.” Salazar rolled onto his back and looked up to the bower, “Bastards. And even with those that were saved they cannot return to their villages or their homes, the mob would kill them on sight.” He let out a growl and got up out of the bed, pacing the room back and forth in a fury. I heard him swear under his breath and mutter several things in Parseltongue. Finally he turned to me, anger etched on his face, his forehead drawn into a frown, his eyes burning.

“They never think, the bastards never think. How many lives they kill, how many lives they destroy. What does it matter to them if a child does not have their mother? If a husband does not have his wife, if a father does not have his children. Love thy neighbour? Hah, they are nothing but selfish bastards, caring only for themselves and their closest kin, waiting for the next one they can kill.”  
I was still sitting up in the bed, the covers drawn between my hands and watching his mad pacing. I felt strangely calm, watching his swift movements and the turn of his heel. He was still muttering when I called to him.

“Salazar,” he looked up, as though only noticing I was still there. “Come to bed.”  
He frowned once more, then shook his head and climbed wearily back into the bed. I wrapped my arms about him and kissed the firm jaw, then his soft lips. I bit and kissed his mouth till he let out a groan and responded to my caresses. His hands gripped tightly to my arms and his desperate kisses became stronger, he kissed down my neck, along my chest, before lying his head down on my shoulder. I stroked through his hair, entwining my fingers around the black curls. He closed his eyes and made no sound, till after a while he glanced up at me and muttered something in parseltongue. The soft hiss made me shiver, but his eyes remained fixed on mine.  
“What does that mean?” I asked, but he shook his head and closed his eyes again. I resumed my ministrations and he soon fell asleep in my arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for the delay, these last few months have been all sorts of crazy. I'm now updating everything, so I hope you enjoy, please do read and leave comments (any criticism is useful). Thank you xx


	7. Fair is Foul and Foul is Fair

As Godric and I had worked hardest yesterday it fell to Rowena and Salazar to suggest the refugees’ plans as we all ate breakfast. Salazar was a good deal calmer today, but he made no attempt to hide his disgust and anger against the muggles. Rowena had already suggested the beginning of a wizarding village near the school, where wizards could live in peace and bring their businesses and families there. It was hard though, many wished to return to the homes and villages they had once loved, the friends and neighbours who had been kind to them, but such things were impossible. It was more than likely their old homes had been torched and if they did go back they would find no welcome there.   
Godric had encouraged some to already think of moving into the lands surrounding the Gryffindor estate or Rowena’s lands; I could make no such promise as I owned no land, apart from my garden, house and tavern. It was up to Salazar’s father whether he accepted the families onto his land, and he was a difficult man to persuade. It was going to be a difficult week of moving wizarding families around the country and establishing them in strange places among people they did not know. I knew people would treat them kindly, with respect and pity, but it would not make life any easier for them. I looked forward to the day when we could open our doors to students, a haven for children, where learning magic was not something to fear or hide.

Godric, across the table from me, suddenly lowered his cup and put his head in his hands. I got up and went to his side.  
“Godric?” I gently clasped his shoulder.  
“You told me it would not end for hundreds of years, but I find myself hoping it would.”  
I glanced away from his hunched shoulders and resigned look, I squeezed his arm comfortingly, “These things take time, they are not resolved overnight. Someday our people will go amongst muggles without fear of being attacked or hated. But for now, you and your family have done all that you could, and even if you see it as not enough, I do.”  
He smiled and held my hand, “Brave deeds are nothing without steadfast loyalty.”  
“Well then, you have plenty of that with Rowena, Salazar and I by your side.”  
“I doubt it not, but I was speaking of you in particular. After all, you have said it will be a virtue of your House.”  
“It will.” I decided against mentioning the virtue of loyalty was only something I hoped would stem from my students being accepted no matter their faults or achievements and realising it was important in life to do the same to others. Forgiveness was necessary, no matter how bitter it first tasted, otherwise we’d be forever battling with the muggles.   
“We have organised most into staying with friends or close kin…” Salazar walked into the room and I almost leapt up away from Godric, as though we had been doing something indecent, though I had only meant to comfort him. Salazar’s dark eyes lingered on me for just a moment longer, his lip turning into a slight sneer and then looked back to Godric.

“The others are going straight to the villages.”  
“Are any going to mine?” I asked.  
“Nay, but I know of one family going near it. Why?” Salazar almost glared at me.  
“I intend to return to my village, to see Alys and to check on our newest arrivals. Being orphaned is in no way easy, Salazar. I’ll go with the family to their place and see them settled, then travel on to Caerleon.”  
“How long for?” Godric asked.  
“I will only be a few days, perhaps a week at the very most.”  
“A week?” his exclamation reminded me why the men in his family were compared to lions.  
“Depending on how long I need to make sure the family is comfortable and aiding the children in Rhosyn melyn. I know Alys is competent, but I wish to see to the children myself. Also, Godric if you hadn’t wanted me to you would’ve sent them onto your house in the first place.”  
He conceded to my point then, “Father is too busy with his travels and the care of his land to take care of children and Gwaine wouldn’t know where to start, I knew you’d take better care of them.”  
I nodded primly and then made my way from the room, as soon as I heard footsteps following me I slowed my pace, I knew who it would be. What took me by surprise was Salazar pulling me into an alcove, hidden by a long tapestry, his hand tightly pinching my arm. Despite the gloom, his eyes bore into mine and I could see the angry shine glimmering in the darkness.  
“What were you doing with Godric?”  
“Eating breakfast.” I replied dumbly.  
A soft growl escaped his lips and he shook me a little, “What were you doing?”  
“He was worried, hurt by all that had happened yesterday and tired of the on-going struggle. Do you not think I would offer him some sympathy?”

I saw Salazar’s jaw clench and he managed to hiss, “He likes you.”  
I pulled away from Salazar’s tight grip, though I did not escape from his grasp, “What? Don’t be ridiculous.”  
“I am not being ridiculous. At first I assumed it was just Godric being Godric, attracted to a woman he has yet to conquer, but I’ve seen the way he looks at you. It is not even simple lust; his father is urging him to find a wife…”  
I managed to pull my arm away from his unforgiving grip, “I do not desire Godric and even if you think so little of me as to sleep with one man and then another, you are mistaken. It seems ironic Godric and I would speak of loyalty then; and now you judge me too harshly to think I would have no morals and seek a man I had no desire for. The only affection I have for him is that of friendship.”   
I pushed aside the tapestry and made my way to the staircase, “It is typical of you to not even care that I will leave in a few days’ time, your only concern being how Godric looks at me, as though I could help that.”  
I longed to linger, to see if he would admit to his jealousy and ask for my forgiveness or continue his annoyance, but I moved quickly down the stairs and did not wait for his response.

 

“Rowena, could you tell me the name of the family who are going to a village near Caerleon?” I called to my friend, she was still working in the Great Hall, receiving owls with the newest reports of witch hangings, homes and plots of land available in different towns and villages and personal letters from the families’ kin and friends writing to see if they were alive and well. She looked up and smiled to me, bidding me sit beside her. She went through several pieces of parchment before finding the right one.  
“Ah yes, the Stump family.” She pointed to a family of four, the father and two sons had dark hair, the mother was fair. I smiled when I saw them; they had been very gracious when receiving our help and the father more than willing to help when other families arrived. Though I had firmly told him he needed to rest eventually. The younger boy was engrossed in a book – Rowena had left a small pile on the end of a table – while the older talked with his parents. Rowena grinned at me.  
“I think I shall take the youngest, though we will have to see what you think of the oldest. I’ve only had time for small conversation.”

I thanked her and made my way over to the Stump family, Mister Stump gave me a short bow and a smile when he saw me approach.   
“Lady Hufflepuff,” he greeted me.  
“Please, I can make no claim to that title. So Mistress Helga will do.”  
“Ah, very well. My name is Athurius Stump; this is my wife Nesta and my boys, Eadred and Osmund.” The oldest boy, Eadred, gave me a small nod and Osmund looked up from his book.  
“I heard tell you were going to a village near my home of Caerleon?”  
“Aye, Mistress Helga. My father is yet living in Clogwynaur.”  
“I have need to visit my house and ensure those there are well, could I accompany you?”  
Nesta smiled at me, “Of course, we’d be more than happy to have your help, if you do intend to travel that way.”  
“We wouldn’t want to push our luck, seeing as you’ve all been so kind to us all.” Geoffrey said, his brow creasing a little.  
“In these times it is our duty to help our fellows.” I replied. “When do you intend to leave?”  
“By tomorrow.”  
“Well if you need any further help; please do not hesitate to ask me.”

Most of the refugees kept themselves busy, desiring us to give them tasks to see to before heading off to their new found homes or family. Godric would take all those who would go to his father’s land and Rowena a small amount to her’s tomorrow. For Godric it was easier, he did not need to ask his father for permission. Rowena still had to seek her husband’s view, though I knew she detested doing so and would have sooner owned the land with full rights. Only one family, the Rosiers were journeying to Serpen Slytherin’s lands and they told us they needed no guide, for the Slytherins were well acquainted with the Rosiers. There were still tensions amongst those gathered and however much the Stump family smiled, they did not hide their sadness any better than those who showed it forthright. Their boys were certainly not going to pretend all was well. All the children remained quiet and solemn, they knew what was lost and it was not only their homes and old friends that had gone.

I spent most of that day helping Rowena develop a plan for a permanent dwelling place for witches and wizards outside the school, but near enough for visits to the market stalls. It could not be so large we decided, it needed to be a place where only a few families could settle, not all; otherwise we’d be overcrowded. Rowena was more practical in her schemes, while I was already imagining market stalls, an inn like the one I had at Caerleon…  
“Helga.” Rowena said sharply.  
“Hmm?” I pulled myself out of day dreams.  
“Concentrate.”  
“Sorry, Rowena. But it will be so wonderful, won’t it?”  
She smiled at me, “Yes, I expect it will. But there is still so much to do at Hogwarts, let alone a little village on the outskirts.”  
“We should think of a name.” I said.  
She frowned in thought, “It ought to have something to do with the school, but I’m not sure yet. Come, let us pack up and go to supper. We have both spent long enough here, it was meant to be your day off and Salazar, of course, is nowhere in sight.” She rolled her eyes and tutted, while I busied myself in organising papers. I saw Rowena wincing though, so I handed the papers over to her and let her organise them as she wished. I could never comprehend her ways of organising her papers. Was it categories and then alphabetical or alphabetical and then categories? I shrugged and flicked my wand at a pile of blankets, neatly folding them. Then I picked up Rowena’s inkstand and her swan feather quill.

We were making our way up the main staircase when Rowena suddenly marched directly in front of me and gave me such a fierce look I nearly took a step back.  
“What is it?” she demanded.  
“What is what?” I asked, feeling slightly foolish for the stupid sounding question.  
“You’re hiding something.”  
“I’m not hiding anything.” I said, attempting to side step her. She blocked my path again.  
“Helga, you’re my greatest friend. I promise I won’t tell anyone…”  
“I’m not hiding anything!” I snapped and walked up the stairs.   
I knew I shouldn’t have, but it was really quite frustrating constantly having Rowena’s suspicion and Salazar’s desire for secrecy. Not to mention Godric’s apparent desire for me.   
I turned back to her, “I’m sorry Ro; I shouldn’t have been so harsh. I am hiding something and I shouldn’t keep it from you.” I muttered, she came to my side.  
“I’m sorry too, I pester you too much. But I do it only because I care about you.”  
“I know. It’s just…Alys has plans for marriage, she only told me two days ago and I do not know how I will run my house without her.” It was such a false lie I was surprise at my own conviction, but perhaps it had something to do with Salazar, he was a quick and believable liar.  
“Oh Helga, you should have said something. Alys is like a sister to you.”  
“As are you, but I didn’t want to concern anyone with such a petty issue.”  
“It is not petty; sometimes we forget other matters are important in times of difficulties. You will miss her, but perhaps she can still run your house, especially if her husband is not wealthy.”  
“Well there is only talk of a betrothal,” I said quickly. I wasn’t that good a liar, if Rowena ever visited my home, and then had to explain why Alys was still unmarried and childless.  
“So there is plenty of time to make plans, and remember, lots of the children there will be staying here.” she said brightly. I wondered if she really believed it, I had always been told I was an exceptionally poor liar.

 

“Late as usual.” Salazar snickered when we entered the dining room.   
Rowena narrowed her eyes at him, “You do not have a leg to stand on, Salazar. Helga was not meant to be helping today and you stayed in the hall but five minutes. If we are late you only have yourself to blame.”  
“Peace Rowena, I have had enough foul words, even if they are meant in jest.” Godric said, pouring a stream of red wine into Rowena’s glass. She sighed and lent back in her chair, giving him a kind smile. Godric looked a little more unperturbed now and he smiled back at her, but his shoulders were still tense and the crease in his forehead had yet to disappear. The easy attitude he had was taking a while to come back.  
“Sit Helga.” Salazar muttered, I felt myself blinking like an owl and hastily took my seat next to him.  
“Are you well, Helga?” Godric asked.  
“Yes, just tired, that’s all.”  
“She would not have been if a certain wizard had decided to help out in the Hall.” Rowena said through clenched teeth, Godric lay a calming hand on hers and I saw Salazar’s hand twitch almost instinctively to his wand.  
“Rowena, I am fine and I would have helped anyway.” I said.  
There was silence around the table as I attempted to pacify the situation, Rowena began to noisily put food on her plate and pass around the dishes, Salazar drowned his wine and then pulled over the flagon to fill his cup. Godric glanced me and raised his eyebrows slightly. When Rowena practically threw a spoon back into a dish of carrots he grabbed her hand and forced her to look at him.

“Rowena.” he said sternly, “I will not have foul tempers and fights around this table, give me a moment of peace here, while the darkness is out there.”  
Rowena’s mouth trembled and I noticed her hands were shaking in Godric’s tight grasp. She remained dry eyed, but her look of fear and worry was unmistakable.  
“I’ve tried to fix this, but I do not know how.” she said, Godric nodded patiently.  
“And now you have three friends who are willing to help you, let them and we can at least hope for some future time of peace.”  
She swallowed and clasped her hands tightly in her lap, “When I have taken some of the witches and wizards to Ravenclaw lands, Maxence desires for me to stay a while, he believes I need to see Helena.”  
Godric frowned on hearing Rowena’s husband’s name, but he smiled boldly at her.  
“Of course, it would do you good to see her and you must miss her while you are here.”  
Rowena did not look up, she began to eat her food, and seemingly ensuring every bit of food was to a correct standard and measurement. My heart ached for her. I knew, even better than Godric or Salazar, why Rowena would be frightened at such a thought; of leaving here and going to her home. Maxence was a good husband, father and lord, but I knew Rowena didn’t love him. She once had been infatuated with the young Ravenclaw lord, forever talking about how clever he was and how charming he was; but in terms of cleverness she soon outdid him, which for most husbands is not an enjoyable sensation, and as for charm, all spells soon wear off. Charm is not enough for a marriage.

Godric was talking with Salazar; one of Salazar’s old friends had begun discussions in Denmark for a possible Wizarding school there and had written to both Godric and Salazar for their suggestions. Rowena seemed a little peeved that she had not been asked, but I was not too insulted by it. There were still fools who believed wizards were better than witches, or at least more respected, but I thought that nonsense. I remained quiet and remembered how much Rowena had pinned her hopes on pregnancy, on the birth of her child just one year after her marriage. She had been married by fifteen, disillusioned by sixteen. Her dream of marriage was already crumbling by then and she hoped by having an heir for the Ravenclaw name would somehow repair what was broken; a unifying force between the two noble families of Scots and French blood.


	8. Yellow Ribbons

I remember I was called upon when she gave birth, little more than a girl myself, of only fourteen years; holding her hand while she cursed and struggled and sweated on the bed. The midwives calling encouragement and Rowena’s tears leaking down her face. Then after what felt like a lifetime, though probably to Rowena eternity, Helena was born. Small and red and wailing, Rowena looked positively repulsed; but after we had washed her and the wet nurse had fed her, while the midwives cleared the bed sheets and brought Rowena a tea, Helena was a rather pretty baby. Although her face was still pink, she was healthy and strong with dark blue eyes and small, sweet nose, little brown curls already on her head. I had been given her and gently bounced her up and down in my arms, placing my finger into her palm and smiling when her hand clasp into a little fist. I brought her over to Rowena.   
  
“Isn’t she lovely, Rowena?” Rowena nodded, but she looked strangely dazed and when I handed her the baby Rowena made no attempt to cuddle her close or look into the little face. I gave Rowena a nudge. “Yes. Lovely.” she said, as though quoting a passage from a book.   
“What will you call her?” I asked, Rowena shrugged.   
“It doesn’t matter too much, it’s a girl.” she said. I had thought better of arguing with Rowena so soon after birthing, I had dismissed her statement as a result of the long, tiring labour. So I gave her a kiss on her forehead and made my way to my room to sleep. I met Lord Maxence on the way.  
“I have heard it is a little girl.” he smiled broadly, he was clearly unperturbed by the birth of a girl.   
“Yes, and she is most beautiful, my lord.”   
“Good and is Rowena well?”   
I had thought about what she said, how uncaring and diminished she seemed, but I gave a broad smile that felt false on my lips, “She is. I am sure she is relieved to have a healthy child.”   
“Well get some rest, Helga. God knows we all need it and thank you for attending to my wife.” I gave him a curtsey and he continued up the stairs to Rowena’s room, while I headed down the corridor to my own. I fell into my bed and thought no more about Rowena’s look of disbelief. 

I had tried not to think about it over the months and then after I left Rowena’s home, the years that followed. I had been worried beforehand, every time Helena cried Rowena would nearly jolt out of her chair, her eyes wide with terror. So while the nanny and wet nurse comforted little Helena, I would comfort Rowena.  
At one point she turned to me, her face as white as a sheet and said, “I can’t mother her. I can’t, every time I pick her up she scrunches her face and makes those choking sounds.”   
“It will come in time, lots of mothers feel overwhelmed and frightened by looking after something so small and precious. And you are young, Rowena, tis natural you are nervous.” I soothed, but Rowena just shook her head and gripped her book fiercely when they brought Helena into the library. I took Helena from them and ticked her tummy, kissing her round cheeks and talking nonsense; she kicked her feet and squealed with laughter. But when I made to put her in Rowena’s lap, Rowena’s arms remained stiffly by her sides, that look of terror etched on her face. I placed Helena on the rug and she sucked on her toes, while I went to Rowena and removed the book from her hands.   
“For now, just pretend you feel confident. No mother knows what she’s doing for the first time; this is just learning Rowena, like learning a very difficult spell or potion. But if you fear how to do it, then you’ll never be any good. The best thing is to try.” I placed Helena in Rowena’s arms and as I instructed she bounced her up and down, a little nervous smile coming to Rowena’s lips. I hoped that would be the end of it. 

* * *

 

“Mother doesn’t like me.” “What?” I said, tidying away the old charcoal used and pieces of paper with Helena’s scribbles. I smiled on seeing one of the family crest, the Eagle looked rather bloated. The name at the top and the motto underneath were mere scrawls along the banner.   
“Mother does not like me. And I don’t like her.” Helena said again.   
“Of course your mama likes you, she loves you very much.” I said, as the little girl, hair tied back in a smooth plait, wearing a light green dress, continued drawing. Helena gave an exaggerated sigh and shook her head.   
“No, she doesn’t. Mama doesn’t like me. Father likes me and you like me, but mama doesn’t. And if I ever want to play or talk with her, she won’t and she tells me to shush and go away. I am done, can I wash my hands?” I frowned as Helena placed her dirty hand in mine and we made our way down to the kitchen. Once there I poured a bowl of water for her and fetched a bar of soap, she giggled and splashed the water. I had noticed, it was impossible not to, when Helena greeted her father or me she would coming running out of the house with a cry of ‘Father!’ or ‘Mistress Helga!’, give us a hug and a kiss and would tell us all she had been doing that day. With her mother, it was always a polite curtsey, downcast eyes and a whispered, ‘Lady Mother’. Rowena would give Helena her blessing, pat her on the head and then make her way indoors, shedding her cloak.   
“You mustn’t think your mother doesn’t love you, she does, very much.” I said to Helena, who gave another shrug as though it did not really matter one way or another.   
“May we go outside now?”   
“Yes, it’s stopped raining.” I said, “But put on your boots.” 

I watched her scamper away, I felt so sad for Rowena, but then she did nothing to improve relations between herself and her daughter. As soon as she had arrived in the Ravenclaw Hall she had locked herself up in the library, as she did every time. It both angered and pained me, but Rowena would refuse to discuss it. Her daughter would be seven now. Only three years and she would probably begin to show signs of her inheritance. That was the only thing Rowena asked about, whether her daughter had shown any signs; not her height or whether she ate well or had any accidents, had she performed magic yet? I told her she expected too much from a young child, but Rowena was always determined. She had drafted her daughter’s entire education and were it not for Godric and me, I would fear she would plan Helena’s entire life. It was fortunate that Helena was a clever child… 

* * *

 

“Helga?”   
“Hmm?” I looked up, Godric grinned at me and Rowena rolled her eyes.   
“Honestly, you have been in a daze all day.” Rowena said.   
“Sorry, I was preoccupied.”   
Godric chuckled, “Salazar asked you a question.”   
“Oh?” I turned to him, a little smirk at the corner of his lips.   
I cursed myself for looking at his mouth and pressed my lips together. His eyes gleamed with satisfaction and he deliberately rested his chin in his hand, bringing the knuckles close to his lips.   
“Sorry? I was miles away.” I said.   
“I asked if you could go to the markets, while at Caerleon, I know you to have some good wizarding stalls there? I have need for some Hellebore, powdered moonstone and Mallowsweet. I can repay you, of course.”   
“Alys and I grow mallowsweet. She always keeps a preserve of the dried plant, will that do or I can pick you some fresh from our garden?”   
“Dried is fine.”   
“And the rest I can get you from the market.”   
“Thank you, Helga.” he smirked and lifted his cup to his lips, to hide his delight in seeing me flustered. 

I scowled at my plate, till I felt one careful finger draw up my left leg and send shivers running through me. I looked over at him, but he continued talking with Rowena on the need of plants from the Forest. While we were gone he would take note of what we had in there and whether any of it could be used. I shifted my leg away, but he grasped my knee with his hand and pulled it back, the hand now trailing lazily on the inside of my thigh. I nervously bit my lip, while Godric and Rowena continued talking. We decided we were not going to talk late into the evening, as we normally did. Godric said we all needed early starts and Salazar said while he did not, he would prefer to enter the Forest with the sun on his back.   
“Make sure you take something to eat.” Rowena said, she had become a little mellower as the evening drew on and her stomach was full.   
Godric laughed. “You are starting to sound like Helga.” I was unsure why, but the offhand comment somehow irritated me. An unreasonable sense of anger flooded through me, though I soon shook my head and reminded myself not to be so sensitive. It was a ridiculous reason to be angry.   
“Well I shall bid you all goodnight.” Salazar rose from his chair, clapped Godric on the shoulder and then pulled Rowena’s hand to his lips. It was an innocent enough gesture, I knew that. But it was not going to stop that little flame of jealousy roaring up inside me. He smirked at me, then performed the same gesture to me, his eyes gazing up into mine, his breath whispering across my knuckles. After that he gave his well-practiced bow and then left the dining room. Godric stretched lazily in his chair, but Rowena’s eyes were narrowed as she gazed in my direction, as though studying me. I knew she would question me if I lingered. 

“Well I am to bed.” Godric said, I practically leapt up from my seat.   
“Me too.”   
He smiled affectionately at me, “Do you wish me to escort you?”   
“No, that’s quite all right. You have been so busy; you must want to sleep badly.” I was unsure whether Salazar would be in my chambers or not, but having to explain his being there to Godric would be beyond me. Godric rubbed the back of his neck.  
“Well I can walk someway with you. For all your kindness, I wished you two hadn’t left me in my chair, my neck is killing me.” Rowena swiftly moved upwards and stood behind him, her hand gently stroked Godric’s neck, before digging her thumbs and making circles near the base of his scalp. He closed his eyes and let out an appreciative little grumble. I’d go so far to say he purred. In the closeness of the gesture I could feel my cheeks heat up, I felt strangely embarrassed, as though I had intruded on this moment. “You cats are all the same.” Rowena chuckled.   
Godric peered out the corner of his eye. “Stroke us in the right way and we’re bound to purr.” he gave her a wink and Rowena let out a very small giggle.   
“Well goodnight.” I said, overly brightly.   
  
Both Godric and Rowena gave me disgruntled looks, but it was not as though this had been an excessively private moment between the two of them. I left the room quickly, but not before hearing Godric murmur something quietly to Rowena and her little approving sigh in response. Well at least that laid Salazar’s doubts to rest, I thought. Whether Godric’s father had plans for marriage or no, Godric was not too bothered either way. Though I had never thought he and Rowena would…No matter how unhappy Rowena was in her marriage, she sought out affection and accomplishment from matters that would not hurt her husband; books and learning were her chief joys and love affair. Rowena had always dismissed the desires of the flesh as foolish and ugly, but perhaps that was because she’d never had a clever and attentive lover. I had been so deep in thought that I had barely noticed making my way down the stairs, now arriving at my room. I glanced back up the stairs, neither Godric nor Rowena were making their way down to go to their towers. Well it was not my concern if they did not; I was not exactly being truthful about my relationship with Salazar. I pulled my door open and walked across my study to my bedroom. The fire in my grate had not died, but flickered across the walls. Salazar gazed into the fire; he had drawn a seat up near the hearth. He did not look up at me when I entered the room, though I kept my eyes on him. I was no longer surprised by his sudden appearances. I picked up my brush on the small table I had for my combs, pins and the badger clasp Rowena had given me for my birthday. I pulled out the twining that held my plait and then unravelled my hair, before pulling the brush through it. I felt his burning gaze on my back, so turned to look at him. He remained watching me, making my movements with the brush feel clumsy and the heat on my cheeks returning once more.   
  
“Godric and Rowena are…” I began, Salazar’s lip curled and he turned back to the fire.   
“You do realise Rowena let him have his way with her a long time ago?” I bit my lip and looked down to my feet, only hearing the scrape of the chair as he stood up and the warmth of him drew near me. I felt foolish for not seeing the way Rowena looked at Godric as anything but the gaze of one friend on another.   
“God Helga…your innocence is delicious.” Salazar murmured, his fingers toying with a strand of my hair, before reaching round the back of my neck and kissing me; his mouth demanding and hot on my own. His other hand reached up to my neck and held me tightly against him. I still felt that little buzz of irritation with what he had said, his accusations of disloyalty and seeking another man, but I found my arms weaving around his neck and shoulders, bringing him closer to me. He shoved me back against the bed, till the back of my knees hit the edge and it was easy for him to knock me off balance. The aching trembling had already begun in my legs and my belly. He roughly shoved my legs apart, bringing up my left to place lingering kisses along my ankle, my calf, up towards my thigh. Nipping along my skin; I was going to have some bruises there by tomorrow, I dreamily thought. He knelt on the bed, pushing up my dress and then bringing both my legs up in his hands. 

“Shouldn’t I get undressed?” I muttered and I heard his soft chuckle in response. His mouth kissed my belly, gradually inching closer to my thighs and the junction between them. I knew his teasing had already made my flesh tingle, his closed kisses against my thighs made it worse. My breath becoming hot and panting between my lips. He placed his body next to mine, so his lips were near my ear.   
“You remember what I told you,” he rubbed his groin against mine, “I want to hear you screaming.” His words sent hot rivulets of desire running through me and I whimpered, he went back to my thighs.   
“More than that.” he smirked and then opening the folds of flesh pressed his hot tongue against the sensitive bud. I nearly jolted up from the bed, but he pushed me flat against it and held me there, while my breaths became shorter and shorter and I wriggled away from his burning tongue. Sharp, almost painful pleasure bursting inside me. He grasped hold of my legs, stopping me from moving and sucked vehemently on the flesh, only releasing me when a cry was wrenched from my throat. He made a small satisfactory noise and came up to my side once more.   
“I am going to make you weep for pleasure.” he murmured along my ear, making me shiver from anticipation.   
“It will not hurt?” I whispered, my throat felt tighter and the words came out faintly. He began to kiss along my jaw, down my neck, his hands reaching under the over layer of my gown, discarding it onto the floor and pulling at the ties of my corset.   
“It may and may not; it depends on how much I want you. And right now, I find myself longing for you, aching to fuck you.” His hands clasped my breasts, the fingers drawing over my nipples. I no longer cared; I arched my back into the caress and moaned wantonly. He dropped his head and seized my mouth in his, biting and sucking along my lower lip. Then he pushed me over so I was lying face down on the bed and ran a hand up my back. I felt the tip of his wand nudge the leather ties along my back.   
“Lacerandum.” He murmured and I felt the sharp snaps of leather breaking. It sent a thrill of delight and fear through me, had he been less careful he could have easily ripped my skin. But his hands were steady, despite the heady smell of desire in the room.  
  
I rolled back over, “You could have hurt me, that spell is dangerous.” I said, he smiled boldly down at me.   
“But I didn’t.” he cast aside the wand and pulled down my corset, yanking off the soft shirt beneath, till my breasts spilt out over the top of the corset. He bit his lip and his eyes were now almost black. Salazar pulled me to him, so my breasts pressed against his chest and then lowered me to the bed, his mouth falling over my breast. My hands scrabbled with his tunic and he wrenched it off, then resumed his strong sucking. I knew I wanted him then, his body against mine, the powerful thrust of his hips.   
“Salazar please,” I begged. He raised his head, that little smile playing on his lips.   
“What would you have me do?” I blinked my eyes open and blushed, his smiled widened and his hand traced a line down my chest towards my groin, were I instinctively bucked my hips up towards his hand. I watched him put two of his fingers inside his mouth and then placed them back between my folds, carefully finding the opening and then pushing inside it. I let out a gasp, then lay back on the bed, the feeling was too overwhelming and I could barely move against those little beckoning motions.   
“Sit up.” he commanded and I did, though it was still a little painful to do so.   
“Untie me.” I reached out and undid the laces of his breeches, though as his fingers pushed back and forth inside me I could not help dropping my head back and moaning. “Come on, Helga. I’d know you’d prefer to have my cock inside you.” 

I scrabbled with the tight bounding, till he pushed down the breeches of his own accord, then swung my legs open wider and instantly thrust inside me. He groaned deeply and pushed my legs wider, beginning to thrust into me.   
“Oh God…” I muttered and he gave another chuckle.   
“Does it feel good this time?”   
“Yes,” I nearly screamed. He knew it did. I pulled him closer to me, his hips slamming into mine, his hands first rubbing my legs then grasping my breasts. His thrusting became more rhythmic and I knew this time would feel so good. I was already reaching the peak of my desires; it would not be long till I fell off the edge.   
“Salazar…Salazar…” Each thrust I had his name on my lips and at one point my moans became so much he placed a hand over my mouth.  
“Shh.” he whispered, “My little wanton witch.”   
That was too much. I fell apart in his arms, panting and groaning into his mouth, the wet warmth pouring out between my legs and my body trembling, under his careful hands. He fell forward into me, his thighs still pushing into me, the sweat along his back slick under my hands and he let himself go with a deep growl.   
“Do you think Godric could make you come this way? Do you think he’d be any good?” he says into my neck.   
“No…no…” I gasp, not really caring what he said or how I responded. I keep my legs tight around his thighs, not letting him go, keeping him inside me. Salazar breathed heavily on my neck and then gave me a final kiss; he pulled my legs away and rolled over onto his back. 

I watched him close his eyes, his dark hair in such stark contrast to the white pillows. I wriggled up to his side and placed my head on his chest, he cautiously opened one eye.   
“After all that and you’re not even going to kiss me goodnight.” I whispered. He grinned, but put his arms around my waist and held me tightly to him.   
“No, I’m not.” he shut his eyes once more; I smiled and lowered my head to kiss him. He made no response at first, but as I drew a way a little he pulled me back towards him.   
“I need to get undressed.” I said.   
“It’s a little too late for that surely?” he smirked.   
“Well I cannot sleep like this.” I got up and took off my corset, then the skirt underneath, folding them neatly over a chair. I examined the broken leather ties.   
“These are ruined.”   
“You only have yourself to blame for buying leather ones, I’ve no patience for leather string.” He gave me an appreciative look when I pulled off my undershirt and climbed back into bed.   
“What will you have me buy then?” I asked, kissing over his chest. He pushed me back on the bed and began to kiss me.   
“Ribbons, silk or satin, if you can find them.”   
“Silk and satin are expensive.” I murmured.   
“I will pay for them.”   
“I don’t want you to pay for them.”   
“I will pay for them.” he growled, I was not meant to argue.   
“What colour?” I murmured, closing my eyes while he ran his mouth over the delicate skin of my inner elbow.   
“What do you think?” he leaned back smiling, and then continued the gentle kiss along my skin, “Yellow.”


	9. Pray You Now, Forget and Forgive

The morning is the same as before, he does not kiss me awake and I know it is not out of tenderness that he leaves me asleep. When I turn over, blink my eyes open and see the other side of the bed is empty, I sigh and then run my hand through my hair. I get up, still feeling a little tender from last night. I get dressed and pull on my travel cloak, the head downstairs to the Great Hall to break my fast with the others and the families gathered. The tables are back to their original places, families gathered in huddles, some speaking with others. There are occasional cries of laughter and murmured talking, Master Stump is speaking rapidly with another wizard, but he raises his hand to me and smiles in greeting. I bid them all good morning, but say I will let them finish their breakfast before talking properly.  
It is rare to sit at the Great Table, we saw no point in doing so, conversing with each other was difficult when found sitting next to one another, instead of opposite. The round table we used was considered more informal and friendly than the long, rectangular table stretching from one side of the Hall to the other. But we had come to realise, should we need more teachers, it would be beneficial to have it. As my table was between Ravenclaw and Slytherin, so I took my place between Rowena and Salazar at the table. Rowena smiled at me, Salazar remained fixated on a letter he was reading, I recognised the hand of his father.

“Where’s Godric?” I asked.  
“He already ate and took some of the families who wished to go to his father’s land by portkey.” Rowena said, she poured me a cup of mint tea and then passed a basket of rolls to me.  
“He’s coming back for the rest and Maxence is going to arrive shortly with his own portkey.” she said. I nodded and took a sip of the sweet, warm liquid, the soft smell of mint making me sigh with pleasure.  
“How are you getting to Caerleon?” Salazar put down his letter and looked up at me.  
“Side-long apparition.” I said, “There will only be five of us, it is easier that way.”  
“There will be no trouble?” he asked.  
“Wales does not take such offense to witches and wizards, as England does.”  
“Nor Scotland.” smiled Rowena, Salazar snickered.  
“The Scots are practically bedding the French, and when it comes to witches the French are even keener on burning.”  
Rowena glared at Salazar vehemently, he raised his hands and his smile grew wider, “You married the French scum!”  
I knew he had been teasing her, not meaning anything by it, but he had pushed his luck. Rowena slammed her knife down and marched from the table. Several people looked up nervously as she passed them; I swallowed my bread roll quickly and took off my napkin.

“Helga,” he called to me, as I got up.  
“No, that was cruel. I’ll not defend you on this account.”  
He leaned back in his chair and watched me leave the hall, following Rowena. It took me but a little time, I first thought she would be in her study, but when I looked out of the window on my way up I spotted her in the grounds. I made my way back down again and went out through the entrance hall. She was sat on the hill side, sitting on a low lying rock, watching several ravens circling over the forest.  
“What do you think they have found?” she asked, hearing my footsteps. She turned to me, her cheeks dirtied with tears and I embraced her at once.  
“Tis best to ignore him, Salazar sometimes says foolish things without thinking.” I soothed her. She put her arm in mine and we made our way down to the edge of the forest, along the path.  
“You are mistaken there, Helga. Salazar always thinks about what he says, he always thinks about what will cause more pain or benefit his rise. Sometimes I can’t understand why Godric likes him.”  
“Godric appreciates those who can voice their opinion, even if it’s an unwelcome one.”  
She scowled and pulled her hand away from mine, “I cannot believe you find it so easy to forgive Salazar.”  
“I’m not forgiving him; I told him it was cruel…”  
“For Gods’ sake, Helga!” I was surprised by her sudden turn on me and the anger in her eyes, “Why do you always forgive everyone? You always have something good to say about Salazar, the muggles who kill our fellows, even the Pope gets your blessing! Why?”  
I cautiously toyed with my sleeve again and bit my lip, Rowena gave a sigh of irritation but before she could speak again I looked up to her, “Because no matter what happens I have to believe there is some good in everyone, that there is a chance for the least likely to do good–”

“Then you are a fool.” she snapped and continued walking down the path, towards the lake.  
“I’d rather be a fool, than live in hate.” I said, but too quietly for Rowena to hear. “I will send Godric to you, when he gets back.” I called to her, Rowena made no response. I was unsure whether to follow her or go back up to the Hall, I did not relish facing Rowena with her sharp comments and her still burning anger. I lifted my skirts and made my way back up to the castle, Salazar had resumed his post against the door, watching me as I climbed up the path.  
“That was unkind, Salazar.” I said reproachfully. He gave a shrug, I expected nothing less.  
“Please go and apologise to her, I will not have strife in this household. Not when so many of our fellows die daily and we are safe here.”

He sighed irritably and looked down to his boots, “I only meant it in jest.”  
“Be that as it may, Rowena’s relations with her husband are not as they once were. She does not find it easy to return to him and your humour makes things no better.”  
I attempted to pass him and go inside, but he grabbed hold of my elbow, “Helga,” he began.  
“No, I will not speak another word to either of you, until you apologise.”  
His cold eyes narrowed, “Did she insult you?”  
“It does not matter either way.” I said, pulling my elbow free and continuing back into the Hall.

 

I was relieved when Godric returned; he seemed in higher spirits and greeted everyone cheerfully. All the children seemed very fond of him and it saddened me that I would have to break that jovial smile with news of a fight between Rowena and Salazar.  
“And here is the rose of the sun,” he called out to me, “How are you Helga?”  
“Well enough, Godric. I am glad to see you looking so cheerful. But…” he came closer on seeing my worried expression, “Salazar and Rowena have argued this morning, it was a stupid comment Salazar made about the French, but Rowena is very cross.”  
Godric frowned and then nodded, “I will speak to Rowena, little quarrels like this are foolish right now.”

He grabbed an apple, then turned about and marched down the Great Hall. I saw Salazar appear in the doorway and Godric stopped to talk to him. Salazar scowled and after a few heated words at least looked a little shame faced. Once Godric was gone, Salazar nodded his head to me and beckoned. I got up from my seat and followed him as he left the Hall. Once we were in the Entrance Hall he took my hand without a word and I followed him down to the dungeons, where his study and room was. I expected us to go to his study, but we continued along to his bedroom and he guided me inside. Once the door was closed and bolted shut, he turned to me.  
“I have apologised to Rowena.”  
“Good.” I nodded, “What did she say?”  
“Nothing, she’s sulking.”  
I sighed; it was the best I could hope for when the two of them had argued.

“I did not wish to part on bad terms.” Salazar muttered, his eyes shifting to look into mine, then away again.  
“I think Rowena is right.” I said, Salazar raised one eyebrow, “I find forgiving you too easy.”  
He smirked, “You find forgiving everyone too easy.”  
I bit my lip and shuffled my feet, was that how everyone saw me, eager to please, unable to stand up for myself, in some ways foolish? A cool, long fingered hand cupped my chin and forced me to look up. My cheeks heated on seeing his look and the way his hand held me so firmly, yet gently. I wetted my lips and cleared my throat; Salazar gave another slow smile, then brought his head down and kissed me. I wrapped my arms tightly around his shoulders and he pushed me against the wall, cold stone making me gasp with surprise.  
I saw his eyes flick towards the bed, I pulled my mouth away and he instantly began to kiss my neck. I dropped my head back, revelling in the sweet, sensitive skin and his burning mouth.  
“We can’t…there’s not enough time.” I managed to gasp.  
He stopped his kissing, though I could not help a little mewl of disappointment and even then his hands traced over my waist, down my thighs and cupping my backside.  
“Then I will see you in a week’s time.” His hands returned to my face and he kissed me again, but he was far tenderer this time, his mouth barely touching mine before sinking a little deeper. He broke away, still inches from my face, his warm breath on my skin.  
“I will miss you.” I said, and he raised my hand to his lips.  
“I look forward to your return.” he dropped my hand and walked toward the window. I followed him, then reached up on my tiptoes again and kissed his cheek, though he made no response. I walked towards the door, lifted the bar, then stepped out into the cooler corridor and walked back to the Great Hall.

 

“Mistress Helga,” Alys cried in greeting to me, though she came out of the garden at once and embraced me. “I’m so glad to see you.”  
“As am I with you Alys.”  
She smiled and laughed, “You are fortunate to be in time for dinner. Come, come inside. Let me take your satchel and cloak.”  
The garden was blooming nicely, the sweet summer flowers and herbs were already filling the rich, warm earth; around the silver birch was a small carpet of daises, thick white petals knitted around the grass, the beds were filled with poppies and marigolds. The air smelled cool and fresh after my journey, and I never liked travelling by disapparating, though I was used to it. It was not warm or bright enough to eat in the garden, but the welcome sight of my cottage and garden cheered me immensely. As we passed into the house I brushed my fingers on the lavender bush, breathing in the calming scent. I smiled, feeling a little foolish, Godric, Rowena and Salazar could keep their grand estates and homes, this was my kingdom and castle.

“Mistress Helga!” three of the adopted children, Gwenith, Cerdic and Hector ran towards me and hugged me, then gave me little curtseys or bows; I surreptitiously smiled at Alys who grinned at their behaviour.  
“You have been gone for ages.” Cerdic, the younger of the three, said to me, “Where have you been?”  
“At Hogwarts, fy annwyl. I’m sorry I cannot write more often, we’re all very busy. But you’ll all be able to go there soon and learn magic.”  
Gwenith rested her head by my hip, “That’ll be good, but Cerdic can’t go there yet.”  
“No he can’t.” I agreed and Cerdic looked so distraught I picked him up and gave him a cuddle, “But in three years’ time you’ll be able to go.”  
“You promise?” he said.  
“I promise.” I turned to Alys, “How are our new arrivals?”  
“They are well enough, as well as they can be. But let’s have dinner first, you can judge them from a distance and then we’ll talk once everyone’s in bed. And no matter what they say about disapparating being easier than muggle means, it doesn’t mean you’re any less tired or hungry from the journey. Sit Helga and let me bring you some mead.”

“Helga, Helga, look.” Hector ran round the table and sat opposite me, while Alys brought me a cup of mead. “Alys has been teaching us and watch this.”  
He drew out his wand and pointed it to a small book at the end of the table, “Wingardium Leviosa.”  
The book wobbled into the air and then thumped back onto the table. I smiled proudly at Hector, but he was frowning.  
“It worked better earlier on, honest Helga, it did.”  
“I believe you, it’s probably just because you are excited or your concentration isn’t so good as it was earlier, you’re probably hungry.”  
Hector scowled at the book and miserably slumped on the table, “I’ll never be a good wizard.”  
“Yes you will, it’ll be better when you’re at Hogwarts, there’ll be lots of opportunity to learn new spells and lots of other children like yourself. Why not try the spell on something lighter for now?”  
Hector shook his head, “No, I lifted the book earlier on and I’ll do it later too.”  
“All right then.” I smiled, thinking that perhaps Hector would end up in Ravenclaw house. Steely determination filling his eyes. Perhaps Slytherin, I smirked and hid my smile.

“We went to London too and I got my wand as well,” Gwenith said, pulling out her wand. I carefully took the wand from her and examined it.  
“It’s very nice, an Ollivander make?” I asked.  
“Yes,” she grinned. “It’s English Oak, Unicorn hair, eleven and three quarter inches, supple.”  
“Mm a very nice wand indeed, we shall have to get Cerdic’s soon.”  
Alys then brought in some plates and cutlery, telling Gwenith to lay the table and for Hector to come with her to get a jug of small ale. Cerdic is sent upstairs to bring down the other two children. My mouth dries considerably and I swallow, the two newest additions to my brood, orphans. I begin to pour everyone a drink from the jug and then pick up the cup to sip at the sweet, malty liquid. Cerdic walks in and sits next to me, he is followed by a young boy and girl, the girl is taller with fair hair and brown eyes, the boy younger with black hair and brilliant green eyes.  
“This is Elric and Luisa. Elric and Luisa, this is Mistress Helga.”  
Elric hung back a little at the door, Dianne gave a neat curtsey, but kept her eyes lowered and sat at the table. Elric followed her closely and sat at her side, he nervously glanced up at me. I gave them both small smiles, now was not the time to address their parents death, but I would do so later. They needed to know they could trust me and pushing them for answers would not be it.

“Good evening, this is my house and I own the tavern in the village. Alys is a friend of mine though and I hope she is caring for you well.”  
They both silently nodded.  
“Mistress Helga teaches us magic and looks after us. Some of us will be going to Hogwarts later to learn with her and Masters Gryffindor and Slytherin and Madame Ravenclaw. They’re all very famous witches and wizards.” Cerdic said, he had always been a talkative boy.  
“We are hardly famous, Cerdic. Though I suppose Godric is…and Rowena…and Salazar.”  
“And you!” Cerdic insisted, “You are Mistress Helga, all the village talks about you.”  
I laughed at that, the village talking about someone hardly made the infamous, the village talked about anyone and everyone if they could.  
“Cerdic, I don’t think that makes me famous…”  
“It does. Bronwyn said her mother was saying how good you were at magic, one of the best in the whole of Wales!”  
“Well that’s very kind of her mother, but I don’t think that quite covers it.”

Alys walked in with a roast chicken, followed by Hector and Gwenith with bowls of carrots and cabbage with leeks. Gwenith ran round the table to sit by me.  
“Gwen, I wanted to sit there.” Hector glowered at her.  
“Hector you can sit by me tomorrow, but why don’t you sit opposite me next to Elric.” Hector grudgingly agreed and Alys shot me a smile, relieved the situation had been defused before becoming a full out argument.  
“This looks very good Alys.” I said.  
“Not as good as yours.” She grinned, I rolled my eyes.  
“Nonsense.”  
“Cerdic is right though.” she said as she dished out the vegetables onto people’s plates and I put chicken on them.  
“Right about what?”  
“Well you’re well known all over the place, I’ve heard strangers at the market place asking for you and they’ve come from all over.”  
I busied myself by pouring gravy onto the children’s plates, “Strangers?”  
“Aye, from England and further afield. France and Italy.”  
“People have heard of me in France and Italy?” I exclaimed.  
“See I told you so.” Cerdic said, spearing a carrot and biting into it.  
“I suppose it’s because they’ve heard of Rowena and Salazar and…”  
“No, they ask especially for you, they don’t mention the others. Well apart from you working with them, but they’re not here because you know Rowena, Godric or Salazar.”  
“Oh…” I managed to say and Gwenith nodded excitedly.  
“Yes and some of them are Lords and Knights and advisors to kings and all sorts.”  
“And some of them are very handsome.” Alys chuckled and Gwenith gave a giggle. Hector didn’t say anything though and Cerdic looked very cross. He lifted his knife and pointed it at me.

“Cerdic don’t do that, it’s rude.” Alys said, Cerdic lowered his knife and instead pointed his finger. His little angry expression was so serious on such a young face that I had to bite back my laughter.  
“Don’t get married to any of them, Mistress Helga. Swear that you won’t.”  
I laughed at that then, “Why am I not allowed to marry any of them?”  
“Because they’ll take you away from here and we won’t get to see you ever again.” He wailed forlornly. I gave him a kiss on his sandy brown head.  
“Now I’m sure if I get married to a nice man he’ll let me come and visit you, whenever I wish.”  
Cerdic seemed a little relieved, but he still muttered into his plate that if I never married we wouldn’t have to worry about such things. 

Alys smiled at him, “Mistress Helga will probably want to marry at some point, Cerdic.”  
“But why?” he said.  
“Because she’ll want children of her own and a husband of her own.”  
“Are we not good enough?” Cerdic said and I couldn’t help my giggle then, he looked dolefully at me. I gave him a quick cuddle.  
“Of course you are, fy hwyaden fach. Any children here will be under my protection and I will give you as much love as I can, but I hope to marry someday, Cerdic. But not just yet.”  
“Good.” he muttered.  
“Stop being such a baby, Cerdic.” Hector said.  
“It’s fine Hector, there’s no need for that and when I do get married I hope all of you can come to my wedding.”  
Gwenith looked excited then, “Can I be a flower girl?”  
I smiled, “Yes, of course. Perhaps Luisa would like too as well?”  
Luisa continued eating for a while, then glanced up and quickly nodded, a fleeting smile on her lips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fy annwyl - my dear
> 
> fy hwyaden fach - my duckling (my apologies if I got the grammar or word phrasing wrong)

**Author's Note:**

> So first chapter up, hope you enjoyed it. This was going to be a one-shot, but I think it'll probably be longer. Not too long, but a good couple of chapters, the characters just wanted development. Have to admit Salazar is a bit of a dick, so I'm fleshing out his character (he's still a dick, just a more complex one).


End file.
